The following is my story about why I love pegging. I have also recorded two podcasts full of just women telling their stories about why they love pegging.
Podcast #115
Podcast #175

Yes, there are indeed many women who love pegging. All women are different and their specific reasons for enjoying strap-on sex are as many and varied as the individual women are. Some women enjoy pegging as another tender, sensual addition to sweet lovemaking. Some like to combine it with other kinks (and those are many and varied as well). Certain themes rise to the top when women talk about why they like pegging. The vulnerability of the man. The taboo aspect. The pleasure of running the show. The fascination of sexually switching places. The deepening of intimacy.

I most definitely love pegging. I know, no surprise there!

But what is it exactly that turns my crank when I don a strap-on and peg my guy? My, my, my…so many things.

The Pleasure Principle

More than any other reason, I love to peg a man because it brings him so much pleasure. Some time ago I had the privilege of introducing a new  lover to pegging. After he came exquisitely hard in his hand while I sunk deep inside him…he gasped, “I had no idea!” I love the cause and effect of watching a man’s body react when I thrust inside him. I love the moans and gasps I can elicit. Pegging allows me to actually be inside him giving him pleasure, which is a thrill in itself; the only time in sexual play that I get to do that. But mostly…I just love to put a man in ecstasy with my strap-on.

Open up, Baby

There is a vulnerability that is necessary for a man to be penetrated. I don’t really see that with vanilla sex. A softness in his face. His eyes become a little unfocused or they close. I love that vulnerability. I love to see a man purely receptive and open…it is a rare and beautiful sight. That vulnerability makes me want to gather him in my arms and fuck him sweetly and continuously until he comes with cries of passion.

Happy at the Helm

I love…running the fuck. I am in control. I can tease him…or pound him…until he begs for release or respite. I can change the angle of my toy just a bit and know it’s driving him crazy with pleasure. Or I can stay still, buried inside him and drive him crazy with wanting more. I am wearing the dildo, so I get to decide.

Forbidden Fruit

I love the taboo aspect of it. I mean, as taboo thrills go – fucking a man in the ass with a strap-on dildo is like the Dubai Tower of illicit sex thrills for me. But also there is the whole ass thing. Sadly, asses suffer from widespread discrimination. People who are happy to dress up their derrière  in sexy articles of clothing designed to attract widespread attention…would never think of  undressing that ass and actually taking it for a drive to see what it can do! Asses are often thought of as a dirty, nasty place that serves only one function, period. Well, let’s see…dirty? Absolutely. Which is why you wash it really, really well before you start playing with it!  Nasty? Yes! Nasty with a capital N and an exclamation mark. The juicy, titillating, throbbing, aching, fun kind of nasty. …Serves only one function? Well there are many many gay men who would beg to differ…and thankfully a growing number of straight men who have also discovered the joys of anal pleasure. *steps off soapbox*

Deliciously Dissident

Flouting  intolerant opinions is a hobby of mine. Above and beyond the ass itself, a lot people have judgments about pegging, from both sides of the dildo. If you are a man who likes pegging, clearly you must be gay…and if you are a woman who likes pegging, you wish you were a man. I love flying in the face of all those judgments and doing what I want just because I enjoy it. Sometimes I think that I gravitate towards kinkier stuff because there is a part of me that resists anyone telling me what I  should or shouldn’t do, most especially in the realm of sexual exploration. So if people view something as taboo – damn, that might be a hot thing to try! I am a bit of a rebel at heart. Does it give me a charge to know that if I told some of my friends about my proclivity for pegging, they would be shocked? Indeed it does. *smile*

The Visuals

The delectable vision of spreading those cheeks and sinking slowly into his ass…that is one of the hottest,  most amazingly arousing visuals I have ever seen….like, ever. Now I know why some of the kinkier dating sites that have amateur videos are overrun with clips of men holding a video camera pointing straight down as their cock is sinking into their woman who is on her hands and knees…I get it, guys! And from a different position, the look on his face when I am stroking my strap-on in and out…that surprised naked passion sort of OMG-what-the-fuck-are-you-doing-to-me-I-love-this look. It’s incomparable. His hands reaching back to pull his ass cheeks apart. Riding me and stroking his cock. So many visuals! Who says women aren’t as visual as men! If more women tried pegging perhaps the numbers would change.

My Pleasure

Do I get pleasure? Oh yes. Oh God, yes. Dripping throbbing, aching, clenching pleasure…without a doubt. I’m playing with how to orgasm while I am actually pegging my guy. Some women do…and I want to join them in that singular pleasure. There are dildos that offer a vibe in the base that are slated for experimentation…I’ll let you know how it goes. Might take a lot of practice…I don’t think he will mind.

Yes indeed, some women love pegging!.

Ruby Ryder

19. June 2013 · Write a comment · Categories: Blog · Tags: , ,

Warning: Clinical blog post coming up. If you wanna play, ya gotta know the rules…

Link to previous post; The Basics of Rimming

While rimming can be a wonderfully intimate, hot experience to give and receive, please know the risks before diving in to that adorable, inviting puckered hole… Consider carefully the exposure you are risking. Unprotected analingus is like unprotected sex and can expose you to the same risks plus some others.

The Risks: Some pretty nasty viral STDs can travel from anus to mouth including herpes, Hepatitis C, Hepatitis A, HPV or HIV. Small cuts or abrasions are not unusual in the mouth, especially after brushing your teeth and flossing. E.Coli infections are a possibility as well.

Hep C and HIV make using protection mandatory. You don’t want to take a risk with these.

Herpes and HPV are kind of an in-between category. Many people already have been exposed to these viruses…and despite the social stigma attached to them they are easily treatable and sometimes non-symptomatic. For what I consider to be a healthy view of these two STD’s, listen to episode 195 of one of my favorite podcasts – “Savage Love” with Dan Savage. (If you have found your way to my blog – Dan Savage is practically required listening!)

The risk of an E.Coli infection is fairly remote and reduced greatly by washing thoroughly before playing, and by taking care of your general health to maintain healthy immunity.

Heptatis A gets a little complicated. Even if you and your partner are exclusive and know you do not have the more serious STD’s, if you insist on rimming without protection, you are smart to get a Hepatitis A vaccination. Why? Because the virus can be found in fecal matter. Although the HAV (Hepatitis A Virus) is only excreted in the feces at the end of the incubation period of the infected person, some people show no symptoms when infected. And check this – Some people who contract HAV can experience a variety of very unpleasant symptoms for up to 40 weeks that can indeed compromise your quality of life. No one wants an experience like that. Keep in mind you can also get infected with HAV through contaminated food and water and this vaccination will protect you from those sources of infection as well.

A vaccination will give you solid protection against the Hepatitis A Virus in 95% of cases for a period of 10 years. The  protection will start 2-4 weeks after the vaccination is given. For those die hard rimming fans who just know you can’t keep your warm wet tongue out of your partner’s ass for long…an additional booster shot administered 6 – 12 months later will provide protection for up to 20 years.

So what is this “Protection” of which you speak? “Barrier” is the correct terminology, and “Dental Dam” is the more widely known form of protection. No – we are not going to be biting the anus here – it’s just that the rectangular pieces of latex that dentists use to protect you from all kinds of stuff going down your throat work really well as a sexual barrier! Bless those dentists. (Will you ever be able to go to the dentist again and not think of sex?!!)

To be completely safe, it is advisable to use a dental dam, or rectangular piece of latex, as a barrier between your mouth and the anus. There are many for sale here and here, in a variety of sizes, thicknesses, opacities, colors and – are you ready for this – flavors!

In a pinch, you can make a barrier with an un-lubricated or dry condom by cutting off both the tip and end, then cutting down the length of it.

If you are rimming with casual partners, please always use a barrier. Refraining from using protection during rimming of a casual sex partner is like fucking them without a condom; not too smart.

Okay – a treat for those of you who read through this necessarily overly-clinical post about the risks of rimming:

For you, dear readers, a spicy viewing recommendation available through instant view on Netflix (for my readers in the USA). The Australian HBO series “Satisfaction” is about a group of women working in a brothel. Highly recommended viewing – gorgeous women (and men!) in unbelievably beautiful lingerie (mostly just the women), this series has amazing eye candy and offers depth as well with portrayals of the joys and pains of being a sex worker (as imagined by the writers of the show, anyway). Very sexy. I’m getting ready to watch season one and two for the second time, and wait for the release of each season with great anticipation. There is a scene where one of the girls makes a dental dam out of a condom, just in case you need to see it done…

Until next time…Happy Rimming.

Ruby Ryder

Rimming, as sexy and hot and intimate and delightfully nasty as it is…is not everyone’s cup of tea. Yet some people love the feel of teasing their tongue into their partner’s ass and feeling them squirm with pleasure. And many people love the sensation of a warm wet tongue pushing into their anus. It can be exquisite. (Can you tell I am biased, here?)

But let’s back up (subtle pun intended) and begin at the beginning for those of you not familiar with the terminology.

Rimming: Using your tongue and lips to stimulate your partner’s anal opening – also called analingus.

Perhaps some of you out there are going ewwww. But there are many of us who love the sensuality of loving attention in such a vulnerable place. Others are turned on by the taboo factor and perceived nastiness of it. The anal area is definitely full of sensitive nerve endings and can be just the thing to stimulate a wickedly intense orgasm. Additionally, rimming can also be lovely foreplay to pegging.

So how does one go about “rimming”? Since you have found your way to this website I assume you take pleasure in or are curious about anal penetration (either giving or receiving). Because this site is all about the glorious act of pegging, I will concentrate primarily on male receiving, though women love rimming, too!

Rimming can be a delicious, teasing introduction and invitation to anal penetration. Men who are interested in the idea of pegging but are inexperienced or apprehensive can experience rimming to see if anal stimulation turns their crank. (I have yet to meet a man who didn’t enjoy it.)  The flutter of a warm wet tongue on his sensitive, puckered opening can produce spontaneous exclamations of pleasure…occasionally a full octave higher then normal…


The optimum positions for receiving rimming are either on hands and knees or laying face down with 2-3 pillows under the hips (or if you are a connoisseur of sex furniture – a Liberator sex cushion rocks.)

The advantage of the hands and knees position is that it will part his cheeks nicely, all the better to receive your attentions. Also, you can easily reach your hand underneath him and stroke his balls and cock for a mind-blowing orgasm.

The benefit of using pillows or a cushion is that it will allow him to relax completely while your tongue and lips are tantalizing his sweet ass…and for beginners, this can be important. If the pillows or cushion are placed forward a bit, giving his manly equipment some room, you can pull his cock back to stimulate it if that’s comfortable for him. Many times if you start with him on pillows at a certain point he will spontaneously get up on his hands and knees just because he wants…more. More stimulation of his cock, deeper penetration of his anus with fingers, toys, or perhaps a strap-on. But I do get ahead of myself…


Massage your partner’s back and butt to relax him. Kiss the back of his neck…brush your nipples against his back. Gentle or feather-light fingers on the small of his back, his butt, the insides of his thighs and his balls. Tune him in sensually. Then pull his legs gently far enough apart (if they are not there already) so you can settle yourself behind him and have the object of your attentions front and center. Knead and stroke his ass cheeks, kissing and licking them softly. Work your way gradually down his crack to his anus. Slowly. Rimming is something to take your time with.

The whole point here is that by the time your tongue actually touches his anus you want him to have been imagining how it would feel for the last 5-10 minutes; craving it. Even if your guy is quite experienced, approaching rimming this way is a first-rate erotic tease. If you get off on seeing your guy squirm – I highly recommend the slow approach.

The Act Itself

There are a variety of techniques that you can mix and match:

Reach your tongue as far as you can down to his perineum or “taint” and begin licking there, slowly working your way up to his anus.

Kiss his anus with soft lips, slowly, over and over.

Touch your soft, warm, wet tongue to his ass and just leave it there for a while, then slowly beginning to move it around.

Flutter your tongue around the edges of his sensitive puckered opening.

Lick him with regular firm strokes of your tongue.

Stiffen your tongue and insert it into his anus, basically fucking him with it.

Your partner will let you know which of these he likes the best, either by moaning or gasping…or pushing back to get more of the luscious thrills you are offering. Pay attention to these signs and you will discover his favorites.

What’s Next?

For some men, rimming can be intensely enjoyable for a fairly long period of time without any other stimulation. Others will crave fingers, butt plugs, dildos and/or cock and balls attention pretty quickly because rimming turns them on so much. At that point it is up to you (and perhaps the nature of your relationship) whether to indulge your man’s urges or make him wait for it.

My personal preference? There are few things as erotically thrilling as when I have made him wait for it so long that when his pegging adventure commences I am treated to his voice, rough with passion, pleading, “Fuck me!”

Bathe That Butt

Okay – I did this kind of back-assward here, because obviously, asses need to be washed thoroughly before rimming. Part of the act can involve a seductive bath or shower together so you are both squeaky clean. Enemas can be part of the ritual if that is something you enjoy, so that you know you are clean inside as well.

The possibility of STD and STI transmission is a very important consideration with rimming. You need to be fully informed about the risks you are taking if you decide to perform rimming without a barrier. As with any sexual activity, know the risks and then make your own decisions.

Butt (hee hee), my dear readers, the hour grows late and I will address that issue in detail in my next post. I know…that’s like placing a gourmet meal in front of you and asking you not to eat it until I give you the fork (you are so gonna use your fingers…). I guess I  am indeed an insufferable tease…!

Seriously, you can find that information pretty easily on the internet – so if you are hot to try out some things I described and can’t wait until my next post, be responsible and please educate yourself about the risks first.

Link to my article: The Risks of Rimming

Happy Rimming!

Ruby Ryder

One of the first questions I hear from ladies who are new to the concept of Pegging is, “Doesn’t it hurt?”

Now these might be ladies who have yet to explore posteriors in any serious fashion – either their own or the posterior of their partner. Yet sometimes I think that reaction is a direct result of their own ass having been at the receiving end of rushed and inexperienced fingers/cocks/toys.

It may indeed be a thrill (for both parties) after indulging in extended foreplay to thrust a cock fast and deep into a slick and wet pussy. Awesome. Just don’t try that with an ass…because all but the most experienced in anal play will probably experience pain, no matter how copious the lube. Key word for anal exploration…slow. Take your time, tease that puckered little hole until you can feel your partner pushing their ass back wanting more. You want them reaching for it, hot for it…because it feels so good. Take…your…time.

So how exactly does one go about teasing an anus? Thought you’d never ask.  Next time…”The Basics of Rimming”.

Thought for the day: Yes, a woman can fuck her man in the ass with a dildo and still be a “lady”. In fact the contradictory nature of combining the two can be seriously hot! “Madonna/Whore” much?

Some prefer their dildos to look realistic. Others enjoy finding one in their favorite color. This is the “Mistress” in shimmering purple by Vixen Creations. 100% silicone. And that’s me wearing it.

Ruby Ryder

A man found my website with the search words:

“i bled after being pegged”

This situation always concerns me. Anal tissues are much more fragile and subject to tearing than, for example, vaginal tissues (where babies are born from). So many people do not realize that care must be taken when approaching anal penetration. A LOT of care. And too many people don’t seem to realize that when I say slow I really mean slow…like half an hour of foreplay, not just sticking your finger in his ass for a minute and then two fingers for a minute and then shoving a dildo up his ass. NO!!!

If you go too fast with pegging, it can definitely cause problems. Bleeding is one of them. If you see any blood while pegging, call it a night, give his ass a rest and try in a couple of days. Usually there will be pain connected to bleeding, too. So some people wonder when to be concerned if there is bleeding. If it’s just a spot or two, no problem. You should still stop the fucking and let his ass recover. If there is more blood and/or it doesn’t stop, a trip to the doctor might be in order. These are the Mayo Clinic’s guidelines for seriousness of symptoms.

For the Newbies

Step-by-step foreplay in my article “Newbie Ass Play”