When budget constraints prevent you from buying the best equipment, consider buying a quality dildo and using this DIY harness while you save up for a good one. Buy once and buy quality!

Here is a visual aid for using two scarves to make a do-it-yourself harness – by Midori!

Here are her instructions, as well.

Midori’s Scarf Harness Visual Aid

 

Public Service Announcement!

Been looking for the answer to this one for quite some time.

As an aficionado of pegging, sometimes things can get a little messy and when that happens, odors can be retained in the toy. I’m talking about excellent quality dildos (because that’s all I use). I’ve tried many things to remove that odor with little success.

Ran across this article by Scott at SquarePeg Toys.

Voilà! Success. I’d just purchased a bottle of pure acetone at the drug store – labeled “professional maximum strength 100% acetone”. Quite inexpensive. (Not the colored, scented fingernail polish remover.)

I have a Blush Novelties Ergo Mini that had retained an odor. That is a dual density dildo, softer than most. According to Scott’s article – the softer toys are more prone to odor retention. (He explains why – go read it.)

Used the acetone as described (I had the makeup pads on hand already) and it worked like a charm.

Spread the word! (Just credit Scott at SquarePeg Toys.)

 

POPDildo_StephanieBerman

Anyone who has searched for an ejaculating dildo has probably had the same experience. Sure, they are out there, but the quality basically sucks.

So – along comes Stephanie Berman – inventor of the Semenette and the POPDildo.

YES, excellent quality ejaculating dildos are now available!

YES, you can hear all about it here:

Interview with Stephanie Berman, CEO of Semenette.

 

 

Fuze Tango

Originally published in the Tantus Sex Ed Blog, June 12, 2015

Strapless Strap-ons…

They are seductive, the way they peek out from a woman’s vaginal lips and curve sexy and bold into the air, ready for action. So many pictures of exactly that. Mesmerizing pictures. Her hand holds her ‘cock’, as if it were real. It looks amazing. Fun colors pushing apart those lips, sometimes surrounded by hair, sometimes not. I particularly like the purple ones, especially when the woman is pale-skinned. The contrast is stark and shocking, yet intoxicating. I just can’t look away. The pictures are even more exciting because I know that the other part is inside her.

Oh, and the ones that look realistic? Damn, they look like the real thing sticking right out from her nether regions! Right where a cock might be if she actually had one. It’s safe to say that these pictures have caused many erections and a lot of wet panties. I mean, you can just envision her thrusting away with it, making her partner moan with each stroke, right? I can. That’s what makes my panties wet.

Only one problem. The vast majority of women cannot hold a strapless strap-on in and effectively fuck their partner with it.

Yep. You heard me right. I can only speak with authority regarding pegging, because that’s my passion. Pegging is the world I am immersed in. That’s what happens in my bed, sometimes over the back of the couch or perhaps on the kitchen table. But I do have anecdotal feedback from my lesbian/queer/bisexual friends, and we all agree. Strapless strap-ons simply…aren’t. They don’t work well enough by themselves. They need a harness!

So let’s talk about why this is so. Again, keep in mind I can only speak with authority from the pegging perspective.

 

It’s Wet in There

First, when a woman gets sexually aroused, she usually gets wet. Slippery wet. Awesome wet. Well, awesome unless you are trying to hold in a strapless strap-on. It’s hard to get a grip on something when you are wet and slippery. The vagina is self-lubricating specifically to make sure that things do slide around inside. So to start with, expecting anything to stay put seems like a fool’s errand. Just sayin’.

Now, where pegging is involved, instead of holding the toy in with vaginal muscles and penetrating another vagina, it’s a vagina holding in the toy and penetrating an anal sphincter. Whereas the level of success is (anecdotally) slightly higher vagina to vagina, when it’s vagina to ass, the ass will win almost every time. Anal sphincter muscles are strong.

 

Get Going With Those Kegels

So let’s talk about the woman’s pelvic floor muscles that are supposed to keep the toy in, also called PC muscles. These are the ones you can exercise doing some variation of Kegel exercises, with or without a Lelo Smart Bead to help. Kegel exercises can definitely help strengthen a woman’s PC muscles. There are many benefits to exercising those muscles. Where strapless strap-ons are concerned, theoretically, the stronger a woman’s PC muscles are, the more likely that she will be able to hold a strapless toy inside her while she fucks her partner. Sounds good. Just get going with the Lelo Smart Bead and you’re good to go, right?

Wrong. Even with very strong PC muscles, the vast majority of women still cannot hold a strapless strap-on inside while doing any kind of active fucking. Sure, she can lie on her back, put her thighs tightly together and her partner can ride her. That can work.  Or she can clamp her legs tightly together and try the limited number of positions that clamped-together legs will allow. There are markedly few women for whom the ‘strapless’ concept actually works in a knees-spread, I’m going to fuck you hard and fast until you come kind of way, though.

I bring up the PC muscle component of strapless strap-ons, because it gives rise to this harmful myth: If she just does enough Kegels, she will be able to hold in a strapless strap-on.

Why is that harmful? Because even with extremely strong PC muscles, this is simply not true for most women. Sadly, women can end up feeling deficient or defective because they cannot live up to the advertising claims in this regard. Oh, me and my sucky, weak-ass PC muscles, clearly I am a slacker and have not done enough Kegels! Women have even been accused of not doing enough Kegels by their disappointed partners, who believed strapless strap-ons were actually strapless! Weird, right?

One man posted in reddit/pegging that his wife has strong enough PC muscles that when his cock is inside her, if she flexes them full strength, she can almost hurt him. Not even this ‘Queen of the Kegels’ can hold in a strapless strap-on. There’s some perspective for you.

 

The Cheaper Choice

So what about the cost factor? Some people buy a strapless strap-on to save money, too. Equipment for strap-on sex can get pricey, so if you can get just the one toy and skip the harness, well that will save you money, right? Brilliant! It’s a great concept, if it actually worked. Quite tempting. But quite inaccurate.

 

Mystifying Marketing

So why are these toys continually marketed as ‘strapless’? Especially when it’s a myth for all but about 5% of women? I don’t know, but it drives me crazy! Manufacturers continue to advertise them as strapless, making an occasional and rare note that maybe she might need a harness to hold it in. Possibly. If her muscles aren’t strong enough.

The purchasers of these toys arrive regularly to my website or to the pegging group on reddit, asking what they did wrong. Why isn’t it working? Why is it so difficult to keep it in? Because my personal mission is to change the world one ass at a time through pegging, I take the time to educate them about the real capabilities of strapless strap-ons. Most of the time they go off and get a harness and eventually find success in pegging.

With that much frustration, though, rest assured much of the pleasure factor goes right out the window, and some women who were reluctant to begin with about trying pegging with their guys reject the whole activity out of hand. Trying to use a double-ended dildo without a harness for your very first pegging experience is not something I would wish on any newbie.

By the way, now that I have established that they are not strapless, I hereby dub them ‘Doubles’, and will refer to them as such for the remainder of this article!

Not For Beginners

Here’s the next important piece of information. In my opinion, Doubles are advanced strap-on toys. The first thing a woman wearing a strap-on needs to do is to learn the basic mechanics of using a cock and fucking someone. She needs to learn how to move, develop new muscles, gain endurance and balance, because fucking someone is an athletic event. I recommend getting a flare-based single dildo with a good harness so she can practice these things. When she has rhythm, strength and confidence, when she knows just what angle, speed and depth really send her man, then get a Double. The time for a Double is down the road a ways, when she has mastered the single and you are both like a well-oiled (and lubed) machine with your pegging skills.

Many men select a Double for their first strap-on equipment purchase because they “want her to get something out of it, too”. Men are programmed to give women pleasure so it can be hard for them to just lie back and receive during the pegging process without feeling a bit guilty and uncomfortable. They need to know that she is getting off, too. Seriously, this is so sweet of them, but somewhat misguided because of the information I just mentioned above. She needs to learn how to fuck first, and the learning curve can be steep.

Picture this. Because seriously, it happens this way more often than not. The woman tries very hard to keep the Double inside her and simply can’t, much less have an orgasm like he wants her to. She doesn’t yet know how to thrust, tilt her hips, and use a cock…because she’s never had one before. All of these factors combine to make for a less than stellar first experience. In fact the recipe fails so often that I don’t understand why Doubles are still marketed as ‘strapless’. I feel that ‘strapless’ marketing is doing a great disservice to newbies interested in strap-on sex.

Doubles – Delicious, Dynamic and Deft!

Now. Here’s the important thing. There are enough things to recommend Doubles without needing to lure people in with a claim of them being strapless. It’s not like there is nothing good about Doubles other than the strapless claim. Doubles are awesome!

They give you incredible tactile feedback because of the inserted bulb that presses against your G-spot. Though you’ll never feel that silicone cock going in and out of your partner exactly like a real cock, with a Double you can feel much more subtle pressures. My favorite is that totally hot moment of initial penetration when I’m waiting for his ass to open up and welcome me in. With a Double I can feel that happening so clearly, the very moment his ass opens and he moans as I slide inside him. It’s a thrill every time and I can feel it happening more vividly with a Double.

Additionally, the pleasure factor should never be downplayed. Doubles are the only strap-on toys that provide G-spot stimulation! Huzzah! That amazing G-spot focus, together with the clitoral vibrations from the Fuze Tango, can provide women with levels of pleasure that can slide them into orgasm territory.

What do I love about doubles? I love to lie on top of my partner for a while and concentrate on all the lovely sensations inside me. Then I begin to move in a way that pleases me. I press into his ass in whatever way thrills my G-spot and clit. He can sense the change. He knows when I am moving for me, instead of for him. That is such a turn on for both of us. I love the way a Double can be used for self-pleasuring while fucking my guy.

Whether a woman orgasms or not, she will likely have a butt load (heh heh) of fun fucking her guy. A Double will definitely allow her to feel more connected and feel more pleasure while fucking her partner. For me, it’s a thrill every time I thrust inside him, feel my G-spot sing and my clit dance between us.

Yeah baby!

So there you have it. The truth (as I see it) about strapless strap-ons.

Now. Can we stop calling them strapless…please?

They are Doubles.

And here’s my favorite!

©Ruby Ryder 2015

IMG_20150106_231146359

This is a common and perfectly acceptable question from newbies. I hear it all the time. The answer, however, is pretty darn complicated. There are many things to consider when buying equipment for the first time. I finally recorded a podcast that details all the considerations that need to be made when purchasing pegging equipment for the very first time. Click on the link below. Feel free to write me with any questions you have! You can contact me at Ruby@PeggingParadise.com

PeggingParadise Podcast #102 – What’s the best equipment?

06. July 2013 · Write a comment · Categories: Blog · Tags:

Well…I am not sure whether I am behind the curve a bit, but I have some dildo news for you lovers of cock-shaped toys. Which…if you are at this website, is all of you, right?!

I’ve written at length about toxic toys, and have generally recommended silicone dildos for their sterilizability, harness compatibility and non-toxic attributes.

Manufacturers have been trying for some time to come up with a realistic skin-like material and also to mimic the harder inner core and softer outer later of a real cock. Tip of the hat to the people working on stuff like that – you folks are awesome; trying to give us better and better products for our pleasure! There are a couple of great new products in the realistic dildo vein (and veined!). I’ve gathered information on those two, as well as the wannabes.

From what I have been able to gather, there are four important characteristics of a these skin-like dildos:

 

  • Actually has a skin-like feel
  • Firm inner core and softer outer layer
  • Non-toxic
  • Easy to clean – sterilizable

 

Before you check out all this info – let me express my opinion…taking the trouble to create a skin-like texture and then telling everyone to cover it up with a condom is…stupid. People review these and say things like – “it is so velvety to the touch!” Well who the hell cares if you need to cover it up with a condom due to toxicity and bacterial issues!

 

Another point to keep in mind is that packaging can say anything – it does not have to be true because the sex toy industry is not regulated. If you want the best, stick with companies that commit to manufacturing and/or selling completely non-toxic toys. Sure you can buy that $24.99 Pleasureskin dildo, cover it with a condom and have a great time with it for a while (if you can stand the smell), but an investment in 100% silicone will last you a long time, assure you of scent-free non-toxicity and ease of cleaning.

 

In researching these “realistic skin-like” dildos, I found that price is indeed the indicator. The cheaper dildos were the ones that failed many of the tests and were quite hard to care for. From what I discovered, I would stay away from Topco Sales and Cal Exotics if you are looking for the best toys.

 

Blush Novelties

Real Nude

Skin-like feel? Check – “Real Nude truly feels… real!”

Dual Density? Check – Sensa Feel™ dual density design. Firm on the inside, soft on the outside,

Non toxic? Check – 100% platinum-cured silicone

Easy to clean? Check – “Hypoallergenic, hygienic, boilable, bleachable and dishwasher safe”

 

Tantus

O2 Revolution

Skin-like feel? Check – “Close your eyes and you won’t know the difference!”

Dual Density? Check – “super soft outer layer of silicone and dense inner layer”, “firmer than Vixskin”

Non toxic? Check – 100% silicone

Easy to clean? Check – “Hypoallergenic, hygienic, boilable, bleachable and dishwasher safe”

 

Vixen Creations

Vixskin

Skin-like feel? Check – “a more realistic feel and greater elasticity”

Dual Density? Check – “Solid inner core for functional use”

Non toxic? Check – 100% silicone

Easy to clean? – Check – “Non-porous, can be cleaned with soap and water or sterilized by boiling for 3 minutes ”

ProsLifetime Warranty!!!

 

 

Topco Sales

PleasureSkin

(also known as SensaFirm, PassionSkin, Trueskin, Techno-skin and Private Touch)

Skin-like feel? Check – “soft, smooth texture for an authentic sensual feel”

Dual Density? Fail – reviews say “shaft is weak and floppy”

Non toxic? Fail – rated a 3 out of 10 by Eden Fantasys. Although phthalate-free, composed of “thermal plastic elastomer variations” and reviewers say it has a strong odor that doesn’t decrease with time. Recommend use with a condom (for toxicity issues as well as bacterial issues).

Easy to clean?Fail – “very porous, making it difficult to clean and easy for germs and dirt to hide “.

Cons – Surface tears easily – from fingernail contact, even. Loses color over time. Extra care – “Should be protected with a condom. They are extremely sensitive and should be cleaned following every use with warm water and toy cleaner or antibacterial soap. Toys made of these materials should be stored in dark cool place.” Lint magnet.

 

Topco Sales

CyberSkin

[also known as New supersoft, Ultra realistic 3.0 (UR3), Futurotic, SoftSkins, SoftTouch, Futurotic Plus, Realskin]

Skin-like feel? Check – “the amazing look and feel of real skin”

Dual Density? Check – “combines the feel of soft skin with an erect shaft and real ball sack”

Non toxic? Fail – rated a 2 out of 10 by Eden Fantasys. Although phthalate-free, composed of “Thermal plastic elastomer (mixture of PVC and silicone)”  Recommend use with a condom (for toxicity issues as well as bacterial issues). Interestingly, consumers report the box says phthalate and PVC-free, and the PDF link for the composition on the website is not functional. Remember – sex toys are not regulated so they can say whatever they want on the package and it might or might not be true.

Easy to clean?Fail – “These materials are extremely porous, making it difficult to clean and easy for germs and dirt to hide”.

Cons – Extra care – “Skin-like materials are extremely sensitive; they should be cleaned before and after every use with warm water and toy cleaner or antibacterial soap. These toys come dusted in a powdery material to maintain their unique texture, clean the toy thoroughly before first use. After each use, clean again and dust with a little cornstarch (not TALC which has been linked to cervical cancer) before storing to prevent the toy from becoming sticky. They should be stored individually in a dark, cool place. Store each toy separately in a plastic zip bag or thin sock because the porous surface can absorb dyes from other materials. These materials are also very incompatible with many substances. Contact with silicone-based lubricants, oil or petroleum based products will cause damages to the surface of the toy.” Lint magnet.

 

CalExotics

Pure Skin

Skin-like feel? Check – “Amazingly life-like feel”

Dual Density? Check – “Plushy soft, feels like “real”, dual density”

Non toxic? Fail – Although phthalate-free, thermal plastic elastomer (mixture of PVC and silicone)  Recommended use with a condom. Reviewers report a persistent strong odor that does not decrease with time.

Easy to clean? – Fail – “These materials are extremely porous, making it difficult to clean and easy for germs and dirt to hide. So protect them with a condom”

Cons – Extra care – “Skin-like materials are extremely sensitive; they should be cleaned before and after every use with warm water and toy cleaner or antibacterial soap. These toys come dusted in a powdery material to maintain their unique texture, clean the toy thoroughly before first use. After each use, clean again and dust with a little cornstarch (not TALC which has been linked to cervical cancer) before storing to prevent the toy from becoming sticky. They should be stored individually in a dark, cool place. Store each toy separately in a plastic zip bag or thin sock because the porous surface can absorb dyes from other materials. These materials are also very incompatible with many substances. Contact with silicone-based lubricants, oil or petroleum based products will cause damages to the surface of the toy. ” Lint magnet.

So, now that you are an informed sex toy consumer, go forth and purchase your skin-like dildo! If you choose the Blush Novelties Real Nude line – know that there are many sizes to choose from. (And be sure to use the coupon code “Ryder” for 15% off!)

Ruby Ryder

 

Toy Talk…

Part of pegging, a very important part, is of course the dildo. If you use butt plugs in your play I’m talking about those as well. In fact let’s just leave the whole pegging concept behind for a moment (with reluctance) and talk about sex toys that are insertable. Whether you are a man or a woman…whether you are inserting them in your ass or your vagina or your mouth (or your partner’s)You need to make sure that the toys you use are not toxic!

A Little History…

The sex toy industry is not regulated…by anyone. Sex toys are classified as “novelty use”, and not under scrutiny of any agency for consumer safety. “Novelty use” means that the item basically has no use and therefore is not regulated (No use? Wow, could we teach them a thing or two!). People like us are indeed using these toys. We are inserting these items in places with mucous membranes and delicate tissues galore.

Toxic toys contain PVC plastics with “phthalates” (pronounced tha-lates), which help to soften the toys. Greenpeace has called on the European Union to ban the use of phthalates in adult novelties, as they have already banned them in toys for children. The latest research indicates that exposure to these substances can upset the body’s ability to regulate hormone production, damage reproduction, and can cause liver and kidney defects. They can also possibly cause cancer.

Rather than go into all the science and controversy around phthalates, I offer a few links to some excellent articles. Here is a piece by Emily Gertz in the Grist from December of 2005. This article by Violet Blue in the SFGate.com November of 2007 is quite good. Another by Tristan Taormino in the Village Voice January 2007. Greenpeace article Bad Vibrations September 2006.

The toxic adult toy purveyors point out that no studies have been done that have positively shown these sex toys are toxic. This is true, because it is hard to prove a connection since the damage is cumulative over a long period of time and no one wants to pay for the study…certainly not the toxic toy makers.

What boggles the mind is that even though 6 different types of phthlates have been banned in children’s toys in percentages greater than .1%, sex toys containing far more than that are sold every day to use in your most private orifices! Do you doubt that this is true? Take a gander at the lab reports of 4 sex toys that Jennifer Pritchett (owner of Smitten Kitten) took in to be analyzed. The one containing the highest percentage had 53% phthalates!!

This should seriously scare the crap out of anyone who uses cheap sex toys from China. How could it not?

 

The Bad Guys

The old guard of adult toy companies typically buy the cheapest toys they can get, usually from China, thereby maximizing their profit. They really don’t care whether they are safe or not. After all, whadda ya gonna do – return it?  Not. This attitude is so sex-negative it appalls me. They assume that there is shame and/or embarrassment connected with sex toys, so of course no one would actually take the trouble to return the “Doc Johnson Huge Double Monster Jelly Dong”, even if it caused burning in orifices that didn’t go away for hours or days.

For the most part, they are right. Even the most sex-positive person would probably just chalk it up as a loss and throw away the offending jelly monster, right? Who wants to return a used sex toy and explain what happened when they used it, especially if it only cost $10? So until now, they have been able to get away distributing poor quality, toxic toys without any blow-back from the consumer.

And to be very very clear here, the manufacturers don’t give a damn whether you get sick because of their toys or not. They can’t be held responsible because sex toys are not regulated. They care about one thing; their profits.

 

The Good Guys (and Gals)

Sex in the City deserves a bit of a nod at this point for the infamous episode with the “Rabbit Pearl” vibrator by Vibratex, Here’s why. That episode brought sex toys more into the open for the American public. As sex toys became a more common purchase, a more savvy consumer emerged and awareness of toxicity increased.  These new consumers demanded high quality, non-toxic toys that were made to last.

Manufacturers started joining the movement…because if there is a market for it, someone will make it! (Kind of like, if they build it, we will insert it? No, not quite.) This new generation of sex-positive companies are challenging the old attitude of “who gives a crap about the customer”. They have research and development departments, use the best materials and actually test their products on real bodies! They make promises to the customer to sell only non-toxic toys. They stand behind what they sell and want to provide customers with toys that are well made, safe, long-lasting and do what they say they will do. It is from these companies as well as retailers like Jennifer Pritchett of Smitten Kitten select sex educators like Violet Blue and Tristan Taormino that the information about toxic toys is spreading. Select retailers started promising to sell only body-safe toys to their customers and became trusted sources for purchases. (both manufacturers and retailers listed below)

Here’s how I look at it…If I take a toy out of the package, insert it and then experience burning in my vagina/ass/mouth for a few hours, no one needs to do a study that proves toxicity to me; I assume it! And this happens to people, believe me. If these chemicals are already banned in children’s toys it’s a no-brainer to avoid using them in sex toys. I have decided to err on the side of caution where sex toys are concerned. If you would like to do the same, here is some information to assist you in your quest…

Be aware – some of the nicest high end sex toys are indeed manufactured in China (because of the cost), so it doesn’t work to just avoid toys made in China because perfectly reputable companies also manufacture there.

 

Clues For Recognizing Phthalate Toys

  • The Smell – toxic toys have a strong chemical smell, which never goes completely away, even with repeated washings.
  • See-Through Dildos – Not all see-through dildos are toxic, but most are. If it is see-though and flexible and soft, it’s probably toxic. A few see-though dildos are made with a substance called “elastomers”; those are safer in terms of not containing phthalates but are still porous and unsterilizable so should be used with a condom and ideally not anally. See-through hard plastic is safe, too, but a much less desirable texture for a toy.
  • Price –  The cheaper the dildo – the more of a guarantee it is toxic. You may be tempted to buy the $10 bright red see-through dildo (they are kind of cool looking)…but you will get what you pay for. Though those brilliantly colored crystal jelly dildos are cheap – they are toxic! In fact the word “jelly” is pretty much synonymous with toxic in the sex toy world.

Be aware that many toys, especially the jelly toys are porous and can not be sterilized! That, by itself, should be enough to stop you from buying them…even without the toxicity.

Note: Some of you are looking for the “skin-like” type of materials. I did a lot of research on those and only 2 were phthalate-free and able to be sterilized:

Tantus O2

Vixen Creations Vixskin

 

Safe Toys! (Toxic Toy Alternatives)

  • 100% Silicone – If you are looking for silicone – silicone is always opaque; never see-through. Best to stick with manufacturers you know and trust. Platinum-cured is best.
  • Glass – gorgeous glass dildos are available in an amazing variety of colors and shapes. Not usually for strap-on harnesses.
  • Stainless Steel- the weight and heat-conducting ability of metal is marvelous and touted by many. Again, not usually for strap-on harnesses.
  • Hard Plastics – Hard plastic is safe, non-porous and has no phthalates.

As a consumer, know this…Reading labels will not always help you! As awareness has increased about toxic toys, the unscrupulous companies have even taken to labeling their products according to what the customer is asking for – which sometimes has no bearing on what is in the package. Basically, since people are asking for phthalate-free, toys are sometimes labeled as phthalate-free when they are not. Again – no one regulates this industry so they can get away with it.

Here’s a second-hand true story about a toy retailer who was speaking to a manufacturer in China about a specific toy he was considering buying:

It went something like this: The retailer asked the manufacturer – “What material is this toy made out of?” The manufacturer replied, “What would you like the label to say?” Thinking he had been misunderstood, the retailer asked again. “No, I want to know what you make this toy out of, it is silicone?” The manufacturer replied, “It doesn’t matter. What do you want the label to say? 100% silicone? Phthalate-free?

Another first-hand story from a man who is very sensitive and reactive to toxic toys:

Me: I have a question for you, if you don’t mind. You mention that you tried many things to remedy the toxic toy problem – did you try a condom over the toy at any point? And if you did – was it to any degree successful in reducing the reaction? The reason I ask is because many sellers of toxic toys say just use a condom on it but there is actually no evidence that a condom will protect you at this point. So I was wondering if you have any anecdotal evidence one way or the other…?

 

Him: I am so happy you asked that question. I have used condoms on the toys I had problems with, and these are the ones that have a very strong “chemical smell” right out of the package. A condom(standard latex) will stop the bad sensations for maybe 5-7 minutes, then the bad sensations are just as bad as without the condom. I figured it was because the chemical that was causing the problem was leeching through the condom. After listening to one of your podcasts, now I know that condoms are not 100% non-reactive as is silicone. It just slows down the “issue”.

 

So think about this – that means that even if you don’t react to the toy with a condom – there is no guarantee that it is not causing problems in your body. Perhaps you are not sensitive in terms of your body reacting to the toxic chemicals as this man is, but that does not mean that no chemicals are getting into your body even with a condom.

 

All you can do is to stick with the companies that you know and trust. They are out there, believe me! One of the ways I test to see if a company sells toxic toys is to do a search for the word “jelly”. You either get jelly toys that come up or you get an article on why they don’t sell toxic toys. Of course there are online retailers out there who sell both the good toys and the bad toys. In that case you need to trust the manufacturer.

 

 

This is an alphabetical list of manufacturers who only make non-toxic toys (so if a company makes a perfectly good platinum-cured silicone dildo but they make toxic stuff, too, they are not on the list). Many of these manufacturers sell online as well.

Babes-n-Horny

Bad Dragon

Big Teaze Toys

BS is Nice

Chavez Dezignz

Fun Factory

Happy Valley Silicone

High Island Health / Aneros

JimmyJane

Lelo

nJoy

NobEssence

PyreXions

Square Peg Toys

Tantus

Therawand

Vixen Creations

Wet For Her

 

This is an alphabetical list of retail stores, online and/or brick and mortar, that sell only non-toxic toys from many different manufacturers.

 A Little More Interesting in Calgary, Canada

Babeland in Seattle and New York

Babes-n-Horny in London, England

Bad Dragon online only

BS is Nice online only

Chavez Dezignz online only

D.Vice in Melbourne, Victoria, Australia

Good Vibes in San Francisco, Cal;California

Holistic Wisdom online only

Kama Sutra Closet in Ventura, California

NobEssence online only

Other Nature in Berlin Germany

Pure Pleasure in Santa Cruz, California

PyreXions online only

The Rubber Rose in San Diego, California

SheBop in Portland, Oregon

Therawand online only

The Smitten Kitten in Minneapolis, Minnesota

The Tool Shed in Milwaukee, WI

Trinity Romance in British Columbia, Canada

Wet For Her online only

Please help me add to the lists – email me with suggestions!

Happy Pegging and play safely!

Strap-less Strap-ons, Harness-less Strap-ons, Double-enders or Doubles.

I’ve seen them referred to as all of the above. There are a number of manufacturers who makes these babies and they vary quite a bit. Let’s take a look at what’s out there….

 

Realdoe pic

Feeldoe/Realdoe

The Feeldoe is perhaps the most well known and has a smooth shiny finish. They also manufacture the Realdoe, which basically looks more realistic in color and shape and has a matte finish. The Feeldoe is offered in varying sizes; Classic, Slim, Stout and More. The Realdoe is offered only in Classic and Slim (same measurements). Both models are offered with vibes and without. The vibes are not strong but some women enjoy them. The material used is 100% silicone. These dildos are quite firm – too firm for some users who prefer a softer, more gentle anal experience. The firmness of the toy does make penetration easier, however and can also make it easier to stimulate the prostate effectively. Some say the angle is not quite right for pegging. (Some say the angle is better for lesbian strap-on sex.) Other users have no such complaints and love their Feeldoe! The Realdoe is about the size of the Feeldoe Classic, and Realdoe Slim is about the size of the Feeldoe Slim. Made of a softer silicone than the Feeldoes, with a matte finish.

 

 

 

 

Fun Factory Share XS
Fun Factory Share
Fun Factory Share
Fun Factory Share XL

Fun Factory Share

The Fun Factory Share comes in 3 sizes, the regular size as well as XS and XL. The matte finish on these toys means that when it’s time to reapply lube – don’t wait because it can be irritating on the tissues rather quickly. These toys are softer, have more give to them and are a bit heavier that the Feeldoe line. Some users complain about the floppiness. They are 100% silicone. The bulb insertion is larger which presents a problem for some women but is exactly what others prefer to keep it in more effectively as well as have more sensation on their G-spot. The XL seems to be quite a challenge size-wise for most receivers!

XS – Lengths of inserted parts: active part: 3.9″ passive part: 5.5″

Diameter – peak active part: 1.37″ toy-peak passive part: 0.89″

Share – Lengths of inserted parts: active part: 3.4″ passive part: 6.3 inch”

Diameter – Toy tip active part: 1.5″ Toy tip passive part: 1.38 ”

XL – Lengths of inserted parts: active part: 3.4″ passive part: 7.1″

Diameter – Toy-peak active part: 1.49″ toy-peak passive part: 1.37″

 

 

 

 

Nexus Senior

Nexus Junior

Vixen Nexus

Another softer and more flexible double-ender, the main difference between this toy vs the Share and Feeldoe is that it was never intended to stay in without a harness. It was always intended to be used with one. The Nexus is offered in 2 sizes; Senior and Junior. A vibe option is not offered. Criticisms are that it is too floppy, but some say this can be a good thing for positions that are not a “straight shot”, so to speak. This is another toy made of 100% silicone. The base of this toy where the dildos are joined can provide nice cushioning for those hard thrusting couples.

Senior: Curved side: 5-¼” x 1-¼” Straight side: 6″ x 1-¾”

Junior: Curved side: 5″ x 1-¼” Straight side: 5-¼” x 1-¼”

 

 

 

 

Happy Valley Tango

Happy Valley Tango

Tango – 6 3/4″ x 1 3/8″ and 4 1/2″ x 1 5/8″.

Love the name. I had not heard much about the Tango, but find that it’s sold in a couple of big name on-line retailers. Described as firmer than the Nexus but softer than the Feeldoe, some people say that the Tango takes all the best parts of the other models and puts it into one toy. This toy is 100% silicone and comes with a vibe. Can’t wait to hear more..

Update: It was time for Ruby to get a double-ended dildo and she chose the Tango. Partly for the reason that it is touted as taking the best parts of all the others. I used it with the Spare Parts Joque harness. My partner enjoyed the feel of the Tango and it was not either too firm or too floppy. The size was good for him, even though he tends to be somewhat tight.

The bulb end fit nicely inside me, not too tight or too loose. Felt great. The vibe placement was excellent. Between the G-spot stimulation from the bulb and the vibe I had a lovely time. I did remove the weak bullet vibe and replace it with a WeVibe Salsa (below). Pricey choice but an excellent one. Love that little vibe; it packs a punch! Plus it is easier to get out of the dildo because it’s a little longer. The Salsa is totally rechargeable, too. Forget about the batteries.

 

WeVibe Tango

WeVibe Tango/Salsa

A Word About Bullet Vibes

The bullet vibes included with these toys are not very powerful. I recommend the rechargeable WeVibe Tango/Salsa bullet vibe (3″ x .625″)as much more powerful replacement. The Tango/Salsa is a tad larger than the standard bullet (2.25″ x .5″) and will stick out a bit, but that does not get in the way, and is actually easier to pull out of the dildo when you are done. The Tango and Salsa are the top of the line bullet vibes – strongest, rechargeable (no batteries!), 8 different vibe patterns and it’s waterproof! The difference between the two is that the Salsa has a typical rounded tip and the Tango has a lipstick contour tip.

 

Not Strapless!

You have probably heard me rant about this a fair amount – but I can’t write an article about double-enders without mentioning the “strapless” part. For heterosexual couples who are using double-ended dildos for pegging, which I assume most of you reading this here at Pegging Paradise are, it is very rare to not need a harness. (This apparently is not the case with lesbian strap-on sex.) So if pegging is what you are doing, just ignore all the ‘strap-less’ or ‘harness-free’ claims…and feel free to admire those fetching pictures of women wearing a double-ended dildo and nothing else, but do not take them for reality.

Why is this so? Kegel muscles, no matter how strong, cannot compete with anal sphincter muscles. In addition, when a woman gets turned on and juicy – that is one more challenge to holding the toy in. Do not fall for the “if she has strong enough Kegel muscles she can keep it in” reasoning. The vast majority of women cannot use these toys without a harness so there is no need to feel less-than or like you don’t have strong enough muscles. Needing a harness for pegging with a double-ended dildo is completely normal.

 

A Word About Lesser Doubles

I am not going to give serious discussion to toys like a long large jelly worm that you are supposed to stick in both people. Those toys are toxic and cannot be sterilized. Do not waste your time or money…and your health. There are a few others out there that cost less but you will likely find they are made of sub-standard materials. Do your research well if you are considering buying one. Make sure it is 100% silicone, phthalate-free and can be sterilized.

Update – there are now doubles like the jelly worms but made of silicone!!

Fun Factory Wave
Fun Factory Sonic

Update – New 100% silicone Double-ended dildos!
Vamp Silicone Duetto
BSisnice Olga
Wet For Her Four

 

Whichever toy you use – please write and share your story…contribute to the collection of knowledge about pegging equipment so the next group of beginners can benefit from our trial and error.

As always – happy pegging!