pariscowboy92

Gentlemen, perhaps you have found your way here from links on the internet somewhere and you were intrigued. Or perhaps your lovely SO has mentioned that she’d like to explore your ass. Only one problem – you have never done ass play. Like, in your whole life. Never. Not so much as a finger. It’s okay. Just keep reading…

Ass Play – Where to start?

The best way to learn about your sexuality is to explore your own body. Masturbation is an excellent example. Since you have played with your cock enough to get it down to a fine art, you are much more knowledgeable about what turns you on and what doesn’t, which helps in communicating the finer points of your sexual preferences to your partner. So it stands to follow that the best way to begin finding pleasure in your ass is to explore it yourself, first.

If, at this juncture, you are sort of freaking out, that playing with your own ass somehow makes you gay, read this and listen to this.

Cleaning out to avoid a mess: Many men find that all they have to do is make sure their bowels are empty before playing, and there’s no problem. This works best if you have a good diet with enough roughage and you are relatively young – I’m going to guess, and say under 40. Typically, feces do not sit in the rectal canal. Rather, they stay up in your colon and periodically get released into the rectal canal, and your body gives you the message that you have to go.

If you want to rinse out in the shower to be sure you are cleaned out, you can just buy a fleet enema and empty out the contents without using it, then fill it up with water from your shower. Put small amounts of water (like 1/4 of the bottle) into your ass and expel it, repeating until the water you expel is clear. You are not trying to give yourself a complete enema – just rinse out the rectal canal. Then wash just the exterior of your anus with soap and water. Easy peasy. You are good to go.

If you want more  information about staying clean, read this

Fingernails: Make sure your nails are trimmed and rough edges are smoothed, and/or use gloves (which can help with clean up as well). The lining of the rectal canal is delicate and can tear easily. You don’t want that to happen, so you should never use anything with sharp edges for anal play, including your fingers!

Lube: Lube is an absolutely essential component to enjoying the exploration of your ass! (And please don’t let any stupid porn video make you think otherwise – spit is not lube.) You can use coconut oil, just be sure to put down a towel because it can stain. Also, take a small amount out and put it in a small bowl or on a plate because you don’t want to stick your fingers back in the jar when they have been in your ass and you suddenly realize that you need more lube.

Or, you can get what I consider to be the best anal lube out there – Sliquid Silk Hybrid lubricant. Completely body-safe, no bad ingredients, lasts a decently long time, doesn’t dry out and get sticky. Amazing stuff. Excellent company.

So now you are cleaned out, fingernails trimmed, and you have your lube. What next?

Position: The position that you find the most comfortable to explore your ass in is very individual. Explore a few and see what works best for you. You need to find a position that is comfortable for you so that you can really relax. Laying on your side with one leg drawn up, on your back with your legs up, on your hands and knees, or sitting back on your knees – those are all positions men talk about. Consider using pillows to support your body. I have even heard a man say his favorite position was…sitting on the toilet! That sounds decidedly not sexy to me, but it works for him. Above all, comfort is important. You need to be able to relax.

Turn On: Get yourself turned on in whatever way works best for you. Porn videos on your phone, fantasizing your favorite scene, reading erotica, jerking off, playing with your nipples or your balls, whatever works. The reason why this is important, is because once you start playing with your ass, it will feel better and you will have an easier time finding your prostate if you are already turned on. It swells with prostatic fluid and becomes more sensitive.

Outside First: Your mantra here is going to be go slow. So you want to start massaging your perineum, the area between your anus and your scrotum. Many men love having this region touched, as it is an indirect stimulation of the prostate. Next just massage your anus, around the rim and back and forth and whatever feels good. If you push on the anus without entering, it will encourage everything to relax.

Inside Next: When you are ready, make sure your finger is well-lubed, take a deep breath and as you breathe out, push out as if you are trying to have a bowel movement (don’t worry, if you have cleaned out, you won’t). This allows the sphincter to open and your finger should slide in fairly easily. If it starts to feel uncomfortable or you feel pain, back off and give your ass more time to open up. Don’t rush your ass! Again, go slow. Sit there for a while and just get used to the new sensation. Initially, the only thing you might feel is like you have to go to the bathroom. That will pass. But many of you will already be thrilled with new and very pleasurable sensations.

prostate massage

Locate Your Prostate: Your prostate is located about 2 inches inside, towards your belly button. Exact same location as a woman’s G-spot, if that helps. The prostate is about the size of a walnut, and is easier to find the more turned on you are. Some men will know as soon as they find it. Other men won’t be able to feel anything at all. Once you’ve found it, experiment with what feels good. Gentle pressure? Stroking? Rubbing in circles? Quick in and out? On and off pressure? Just remember not to aggressively poke the prostate. It is a gland and you don’t want to bruise it.

From here, just explore, and discover what feels good to you!

Some Cool Things to try:

Jerk Off: Most men report that an orgasm from combined prostate stimulation and penile stimulation feels about 10 times more powerful than a normal orgasm. Jerk off while playing with your ass and see what happens! As a side note – do not be concerned if you are unable to attain an erection while you are playing with your ass. This is completely normal. Some men have erections that come and go, some men stay hard the whole time and some men can’t get hard at all. All of those are completely normal.

Prostate Massage Only: Alternately, use your fingers or a toy and only massage your prostate. Some men say that they really don’t enjoy concurrent penile stimulation with prostate play, that it somehow distracts them from the amazing sensations they get from the prostate, because it’s a different type of sensation. You might be one of those guys! And some men can even orgasm from prostate stimulation alone, as well as enjoy multiple orgasms (so if you are still reading and were wondering why you should try this…there you go).

Butt Plugs: Will stimulate your prostate and can be worn during many activities. Intercourse, oral sex in either direction, foreplay. Watching a movie with your SO or out to dinner with her. Making a quick trip to the store and wanting to have a more fun experience! No one will ever guess the reason for that big smile on your face. You are limited only by your imagination. And by the toy. For longer term wear, I suggest the Njoy Pure Plugs or the Tantus Ryder Anal Plug. Both of these choices are designed so that the base sits between your ass cheeks more comfortably, and the differential between the widest point and the neck is large enough so that the plugs stay in more easily.

Prostate Toys: Some men find using their own fingers awkward. If you are not flexible enough, your arms are short, torso is long, fingers are short, prostate is further in – there can be a lot of reasons – your ass can be difficult to reach, which makes finding your prostate nigh impossible.

In that case, or if you just want to take your ass play to another level entirely, I recommend four different toys. The first two do not offer vibrations and the second two do. Vibrations are a matter of preference – some men don’t like them at all and say it makes everything sort of go numb. Other men say they can’t really get much pleasure from their prostrate until they use a vibrating toy. Experiment! Remember that anal toys must have a flared base to be safe, and make sure they are not toxic!

Aneros Helix Syn: When inserted, this device is designed to provide hands-free prostate stimulation by clenching your anal sphincter. It’s a great toy to wake up that area of your body to the pleasures that are possible. And some men find they can orgasm hands-free while using it! This is a great toy for beginners. And should the opportunity present itself, it can be worn during intercourse with explosive results!

Njoy PurewandThe curve, length and shape of this toy is absolutely perfect for prostate stimulation, solo or with a partner. Makes your prostate easier to reach, and longer ass play sessions are almost effortless because of the weight of this solid stainless steel toy. Designed by an engineer with a love of ass play, this toy gets rave reviews across the board (and is amazing for G-spot stimulation, too). The Purewand has a smaller end and a larger one, in case your ass starts craving something a little more at some point. The smooth metal will hold heat, and feels delicious warmed up by running hot water over it (not too hot!).

Lelo Loki and Loki Wave Prostate Massagers: If you like vibrations on your prostate, these are the Cadillac of prostate massagers. The curved design is perfect for reaching the prostate, and the variety of vibration patterns and intensity levels allow you to adjust this toy to your own preferences. Pretty quiet, too! Rechargeable – never worry about batteries again. The size is just big enough to be effective but not large enough to challenge. The Wave practically does all the work for you!

Aneros Vice: Another excellent toy that offers vibrations for anal play is the Vice. It’s a beautifully designed piece of equipment, the shape is made to rest right against your prostate. The removable vibrator is machined steel and packs a punch. Three vibration patterns with 3 levels of intensity. Uses one AAA battery. Just as quiet as the Lelo Loki. A of mine says this toy is so intense that he only uses it once a month and the neighbors hear him yell when he comes.

pariscowboy93

Have fun playing with your ass! Just remember….

Cardinal Rules of Ass Play

No Numbing Agents!

Not Too Fast

Not Too Big

Nothing Sharp

Plenty of Lube

Anal Safe Toys

 

 ©Ruby Ryder

 

pariscowboy92

Reassurance for the Men

Gentlemen! Are you a little concerned that you enjoy ass play? Here’s my message for you. It’s all going to be okay, really. Just click the words above and have a listen…

In the time that I have been enthusiastically exploring and learning about pegging, I’ve learned so much about what it feels like for a man to have a woman slip a dildo inside him and fuck his sweet ass. I did learn from practice, often the best way to learn. But I also participated in many forums online where men waxed poetic about getting pegged….sharing information about how it feels, what positions are best for the most pleasure, what kinds of orgasms they have experienced and the particular sensations associated with each. In all of my explorations, conversations and discussions, the same theme kept coming back over and over. Pleasure, pleasure and more pleasure.

So let me formally and unequivocally answer the question posed by the title of this article…

Yes, Yes and Yes. Oh….and Yes.

And…OH!! YES!!

Okay…there will of course be the occasional man who does not get a thrill out of pegging…because people are delightfully diverse. Bodies are different, emotional makeups differ and sexual openness will vary. There will also be the occasional man who hates even a finger in his ass because it hurts, or even if it doesn’t hurt ass play is just not his thing. They are out there. But for the overwhelming majority of men…it feels incredible. Really incredible.

Reassuring the Women

If you are a woman reading this and you have doubts about pegging your husband/boyfriend/significant other because you can’t see how he could possibly enjoy it…please, do read on. I have become a firm believer that the only way to be good at giving anal sex is to receive it. Many women have been on the receiving end of bad anal sex. You know the kind. The well-meaning inexperienced guy shoves his spit-on cock up your ass because he doesn’t have a clue that you can’t treat an ass like a vagina (that’s what they do in the porn movies, right?)….and it fucking hurts like hell…so you never, ever want to have anal sex again…ever. I know this happens more than people realize. So maybe years go by…and now a guy is asking you to fuck him in the ass? I see how you could be confused. Here’s the secret:

Anal sex done correctly does not hurt.

Without going into the specifics of how to peg your guy (that is elsewhere on this website), what I want to make sure that you realize is that not only will it not hurt your man if you do it right, there is a very good chance he will be over the moon, singing, swooning and having orgasms more intense than anything he’s ever experienced! So if you have found your way to my website because your guy is asking you to peg him…chances are he may have already found out on his own that anal stimulation feels amazing or he’s heard that it is and would love to explore with you. Awesome – one more way to experience intimate pleasure as a couple. Keep reading.

Why does Pegging feel so good to men?

Two words. Prostate gland. Direct stimulation of a man’s prostate gland can feel as good as a woman’s G-spot feels when stimulated. Really. So yes…it can absolutely bring a man thrilling, orgasmic sensations as well as actual orgasms with stimulation of his cock and sometimes even…without touching his cock at all.

Reassuring the Men

If you have found your way to this website you may be one of the incredibly lucky men whose woman has actually approached you with the idea of pegging. And yes, you are quite fortunate. Or perhaps you have heard or read about the potential pleasure involved and just wanted to learn more. No matter how you got here, if you are at all questioning whether strap-on sex can be enjoyable, rest assured that it can indeed bring you exquisite pleasure and is well worth exploring with your partner. You have the potential to delight in orgasms ten times more powerful than anything you have ever experienced , orgasms that produce prodigious amounts of come. Some men can orgasm without touching their cock, and those “hands-free” orgasms can not only be the most exquisite of all, some men attain multiple orgasms that way as well. How could you possibly read all that and not at least give it a try?!

Yes, Pegging feels…incredible. And here’s a Newsflash:

Women can orgasm from pegging, too.

 

What the Men Say About Pegging Orgasms

“The best way I know to describe it is very close to a female orgasm. They start in my tummy/pelvis and radiate through my body in wave after wave of pleasure. No, I do not experience any kind of ejaculation either. Many times I am left lying there limp as a rag doll.”

“I haven’t had many experiences but every time a woman has used her strap-on and taken my ass…I’ll get super hard and cum very hard too.”

“I have very strong to the point of shaking orgasms and just a gusher of cum, hit the ceiling strong.”

“I absolutely can orgasm, in a very non-male way.. no ejaculate… As described by a few others, it’s sort of a mind/brain short circuiting body sensory meltdown.. I shake and quiver uncontrollably, breath very short and rapidly, and become incredibly sensitive to sounds and touch… This can go for several minutes (in one case), but usually only lasts 30-60 seconds… When it’s done I feel like I’ve run a marathon.. Exhausted and quivering… It leaves my mind cleared out like shaking an etch-a-sketch… Sign me up anytime for more :)”

Ya know, I’m very skeptical… So much BS spread around… I decided to try this and prove you all wrong… I fired up my fucking machine with a moderate dildo, and ran it for 25 minutes… Nothing… Then I recalled a few prostate orgasm videos which showed what everybody is talking about.. Watching the technique and pressure they used, I decided to try a firmer, plastic g spot vibrator…after a few minutes, the feeling grew intense, and all my muscles involuntarily tense and I let out this deep throated groan losing all control.. The muscles released, and I was panting for my breath.. A few minutes later .. The same… 4 times in 20 minutes… I can only conclude they were anal orgasms… No ejaculate.. Just extreme contractions…I can’t wait to do it again… It truly happens… Amazing experience…I’m a believer!

Kudos to those of you who allowed me to use your comments here. Thanks for sharing descriptions of your orgasmic pegging experience with us and here’s hoping it convinces a few of the curious to give it a try.

Note: Pain is an indicator. If you experience pain with anal stimulation despite slow exploration with small fingers/toys and plenty of lube, get checked by your doctor just to make sure you do not have a medical condition that needs attention.

If you are a man who wants to approach your woman about pegging this article is for you.

(If you are a woman who wants to approach your man about pegging, click here.)

 

http://isissandosiriss.tumblr.com/image/28677070563

http://isissandosiriss.tumblr.com/image/28677070563

Podcast #112 – For the Ladies

Update: I recorded the above podcast specifically for the circumstances where you have just introduced your partner to the concept of pegging. The podcast is in my voice, talking to her. I offer accurate information, dispel myths and misconceptions, and emphasize the health of the relationship above all. I don’t try to persuade, I inform, and verbally hold space for those who decide it’s not their thing. Please listen to it first before sharing it with your partner, because only you can decide whether it’s appropriate for her!

I Don’t Want Her to Think I’m a Freak

For you gentlemen who have an established relationship and you want more than anything to convince your partner to peg you…what is the best way to do this? How can you approach your lady…and let her know that pegging is what you fantasize about, dream about…that you’d like nothing more than to have her slide a smooth silicone cock slowly up your ass? And how can you get this idea across without her thinking…you are a freak/gay/twisted/weird? I will do my very best to try and help you here…but please realize there are many contributing factors. While some of you may be able to just casually mention your interest and quickly find yourselves shopping for the right dildo, others will find that despite their best efforts, their partner won’t consider pegging…at all, period, end of discussion, case closed. But let us remain hopeful…


Communication and GGG

First, communication is the key. You need to be able to ask for what you want. If you can’t open your mouth and talk with your partner about sex, she is not going to magically intuit that you want to get fucked up the ass with a dildo. If you demand instead of ask…that’s not likely to meet with any success, either. Take a good long look at your relationship first. Do your very best to practice Dan Savage‘s GGG – Good, Giving and Game. “Think ‘good in bed,’ ‘giving equal time and equal pleasure,’ and ‘game for anything—within reason.'” If you just want to find one more way to please yourself and you don’t really give a flying fuck about her pleasure, don’t bother asking for anything until you get your act together…seriously. We are not just talking about your lady’s willingness to peg you…we are also talking about the state of your relationship with her…Think about it. Make sure you take into consideration her state of mind and whether she is stressed out with time demands, work, children, etc. Do your best to alleviate her stress and make sure you contribute equally to the relationship.

If you are indeed GGG and think you have a partner who is so open to new things while remaining unaffected by misconceptions and stereotypes that you can just tell her straight away that you would like to try pegging, by all means go for it. Some men actually have success this way! But be forewarned that you may also put her off the idea for good. Big risk. If you even get a hint that any part of her will be reticent about the idea for whatever reason she may have, I’d advise using a different, more gradual approach. Keep reading.

 

Important – Do Not Ask For Strap-on Play Right Off!

Patience is the key here. Many women when asked for strap-on play right off the bat have refused because they have no idea what pleasure the prostate can bring. Also, they have nothing to counter the usual misconceptions connected with pegging. If those same men would have asked just for fingers to start with it’s likely that some of the women who refused would have indulged their men in an attempt to bring him pleasure and then discovered just how amazing it could be for their man. So remember, have patience and ask for fingers first. Bide your time.

Next, let’s divide your women into two general categories: those who accept anal stimulation themselves and those who don’t.

 

She’s Into Anal

If your lady has already shown a willingness to engage in anal play, you have a foot in the door. If she is willing to let you put a finger or toy or your cock in her ass, there is a much better chance she will consent to exploring yours. Tell her you can see she is enjoying it and you want to see what it feels like. Or…you read an article about prostate orgasms and want to experiment. Or you heard from a friend/read on the internet that men can have insanely powerful orgasms with a lot of come and you’d like to try it out just to see what happens!

 

She’s Not Into Anal

This is a more difficult category, guys. Maybe you have a woman who has always refused anything anal; you touch her anus and she flinches or pulls away. There can be a lot of reasons for this. Perhaps she was told as a child her anus is dirty and should never be touched. Perhaps she thinks that only sluts have anal sex. Perhaps she is a bit of a germaphobe. Maybe she’s just totally grossed out by anything to do with excrement. Or maybe it’s just as simple as she has not yet been able to open up and own her sexuality without being concerned about what other people think. Sometimes that comes with age. Any or all of these could be true. Or…it could also be true that no one has ever played with her ass before (including you) and she just doesn’t know how pleasurable it can be.

Be aware that there are women out there that just don’t like receiving any kind of anal – yet that does not preclude their interest in fucking you! So even if your partner is not into anal at all – she could still be an enthusiastic pegger. Receiving anal herself is not a requirement. So if your partner gladly slips a finger up your ass during a blow job but steadfastly refuses to let anything near her ass, this is still good news. Just skip down to Offer Another Trade.

 

For the woman who is not into anal, consider the following approaches and ideas:

Explore Her Ass First

Two ways to do this…only you know your partner well enough to know which one might work best.

1) Get her incredibly horny (oral, kissing, nipple play, etc.) and ask if you can please, please, please play with her ass. Put your pride aside and fucking beg, if that’s what it takes. Promise her that you will only use your lips, tongue (if you are into rimming) and one finger or a small toy; your cock is not going to come anywhere near her ass. Because that is the fear of many women – the ignorant and savage thrust of a cock up an ass as if it were a pussy has put many women off anal sex….forever. So you need to go at this ultra-slow. And no matter how tempting it is for you to slide your cock into her ass…don’t do it unless she asks for it! And even if she asks for it, continue to tease and play and open her up for a while until she’s begging for it and you can easily put 2 – 3 fingers inside her. If she doesn’t ask for it…do some ass play as foreplay and then fuck her vaginally. Afterward, wax poetic about how totally hot that was to play with her ass and you absolutely loved it. The idea here is to get her used to ass play in general before asking her to peg you…and to wake her ass up to the pleasure potential there. Important: while you are playing with her ass keep the communication lines open and keep asking her if she likes what you are doing as you try different things.

2) Discuss your desire to play with her ass when you are not in bed, when you are having some close together time. Ask her if she would be willing to let you play with her there…that you promise it won’t hurt and just the thought of it really gets you excited (and you swear you will absolutely not put your cock up her ass). Reassure her, if it seems necessary, that you will love and respect her no matter what you two do in bed, and you will attend to cleanliness issues in whatever way helps her to feel comfortable. If you are not into rimming or the thought of it grosses her out, fingers and small toys are fine…even a small toy that vibrates! If she agrees, proceed as described above. If she becomes receptive to anal play, consider anal beads and experiment with pulling the beads out at the moment of orgasm trick. Find out what she likes best – ask questions!

 

Offer a Trade

If she is reticent – offer a trade. Tell her that if she will let you play with her ass one night, you will do whatever she wants the next night. And be ready to fulfill any reasonable request of hers. This is all about mutual pleasure. If you can get her to enjoy anal play…it is much easier to introduce the concept of her exploring your ass. (If she refuses – see below “Show her How Good it Feels For You”.)

Once you have played with her ass several times very successfully (not necessarily even fucked it) you can try talking with her about how you would really like to know how ass play feels. You can see how much she is enjoying it, and you read/heard that orgasms for men can be insanely powerful with anal play. Don’t mention the strap-on yet. If she goes for it – excellent! If she is still reticent…

 

Offer Another Trade

Tell her you will trade her one night of pleasing her in whatever way she likes best (it’s all about her) for a night where she indulges you in some ass play (it’s all about you). Suggest that if there is something she’s wanted to try but hasn’t asked for yet, this would be a fine time to put it on the table, as you are very interested in pleasing her sexually in the way she wants to be pleased. And you’d like to explore your interests as well. Just be ready to put on the lace panties or paint her nails or whatever it is she wants. As long as it is not a hard limit – it would behoove you to indulge her…just as you are asking her to indulge you.

 

Resistant? Start Off Slow

Do not go straight to asking her to fuck you in the ass with a dildo! Too much, too fast. Tell her again that you have discovered/read/heard that ass play feels really good for men and you want to explore it with her. Have her try fingers first (gloves if she wants them), giving her nothing but positive feedback if she’s game. Pick out a plug together and ask her to put it in you to wear while you are fucking her or when she is giving you a blow job or hand job. (Invite her to wear it while you are fucking her, too!) Exclaim how amazing your orgasms are with the plug in and suggest you try other toys. Maybe at that point talk with her about strap-ons. Tell her, while looking into her eyes with the best smoking-hot look you can muster, that just the thought of her…wearing a strap-on and doing you…about sends you over the edge. Just the thought.


Choose Your Timing

Do not start a conversation like this when you are in the middle of having sex. Talk with your partner about this out of the bedroom. Otherwise she will feel pressured and believe me – you stand a really good chance of killing the mood…and killing your chances. Choose a time when she is relaxed, receptive and maybe even had a glass or two of wine. An incredibly important point here is that you need to be a partner who is responsive to her needs if you are asking her to be responsive to yours. Read that again and think about it…and if you are not that kind of partner, make those changes before you ask for pegging. Your woman needs to feel that you take very good care of her needs and desires in the bedroom. If she feels that way, she will be much more likely to give you what you are asking for.

 

Confidence

A friend of mine offered another very important point to keep in mind when you ask for what you want. Her words say it best.

“Women are like dogs in that we can smell fear….if, when you ask us to play with your ass, you are worried or nervous, we will sense it and think you’re asking for something weird. If you project confidence that you’re asking for something totally normal, we’re more likely to agree.” Strap-on Jo

 

You’re Gay?!…This Will Turn You Gay!!

Undoubtedly, some of you will encounter the “gay” reaction from your partner. So…

I am going to give you a few choices of what to say if she accuses you of being gay or worries that if she pegs you it will “turn” you gay.

  • “That’s silly, Honey. If fucking a guy in the ass with a dildo makes him gay…then fucking a lesbian with a strap-on will turn her straight!”

Okay, maybe you don’t talk this way…maybe you are at a fine restaurant and trying to have this conversation clandestinely. Here is a toned-down version:

  • “Don’t be silly, Darling. The area of my body that I enjoy having stimulated has no bearing whatsoever on the gender I prefer. I am completely, 100% straight, period. The only person I want playing with me…there…is you.”

Other options:

  • “Nope, I definitely prefer breasts with my strap-on. Would never let a guy near my ass. You got nothin’ to worry about, Babe.”
  • I am just interested in exploring whatever brings us pleasure, Honey…I haven’t switched camps!!”
  • Your pussy is the only thing I want to sink my cock into, and your strap-on is the only thing I am interested in having sunk into me.”

You can also show her or read to her “No, He’s Not Gay” where I go into this in more detail.

 

She’s Freaked Out by Wearing a Cock

I didn’t know this was an issue, because I never had any back off strapping on a dildo. Some women, however, have a real reaction to it. She may think it means she wants a cock and it freaks her out (tell her you know she doesn’t want a cock for real – this is just about using toys to play)…or it feels too much like role reversal and she is really not into that idea (tell her you have no interest in reversing roles…but you are interested in playing with toys)…or it’s just too awkward and she feels foolish (tell her trying something new often feels awkward and that’s okay – you will both figure it out). If your lady has played with your ass and is okay with that, leave the harness aside and let her use the dildo with her hand. Once she tries it she may warm up to the idea of strapping it on. She may not, but one can hope.

 

It’s Dirty

If she’s resistant because of the “dirty” idea, tell her you will prepare by giving yourself an enema and she can use gloves. You will do everything you can to be as clean as possible. This means not eating a lot of crap or drinking alcohol a few days before, too, because that will make your feces stink more than usual. Read “Keeping Things Clean” and take the advised steps to ensure a positive experience for both of you.

 

Do NOT Show Her the Porn

Whatever you do, do NOT show her your favorite porn clip of pegging! I say this because the vast majority of “professional” pegging porn includes aspects of humiliation, feminization and abuse. If you play that way – more power to you, but I suspect if you are here reading this article you have a partner that might be a little more vanilla. The very last thing you want is for her to see that porn showing a guy dressed up as a woman and being beaten while she taunts him and fucks him. Again – this is not a judgment about what turns you or your partner on. I am just saying be aware of what you are exposing her to and how she might react to it. Spend some time looking for a few hot amateur porn clips that are loving and gentle and the man is moaning in ecstasy. They are out there!

 

Show Her How Good it Feels For You

If she is completely unwilling to give or receive anal pleasure and you are not willing to live without it, go ahead and carefully lay your cards on the table that you are very interested in ass play yourself, even if she does not want her ass explored. Consider asking her if you can just put in a butt plug while you fuck her, just to see what it feels like. She won’t have to do anything; you put it in yourself (moan a little). When she sees/hears the intensity of your orgasm, she might be more curious and interested in checking out your ass. This works for women who are sincerely interested in giving their men pleasure. If she doesn’t give a hoot about your pleasure…I don’t have any magic words for you. Maybe call Dan Savage (sex advice columnist) to explore your options.

 

Warning! Read This Before You Act!

Men who would love to experience pegging have fears of expressing their desires, understandably. There are some men who never confess their fantasies much less try to turn them into reality because they are so afraid of or even certain of rejection. Indeed, with the taboo factor and society’s puerile judgment that if a man likes anything anal he must be gay, men’s fears are legitimate. I’m telling you this because you need to make sure your partner is trustworthy before you divulge your innermost sexual desires to them. Only you can make that judgment call. And I so wish I had a magic wand for you. On one hand I would love to see you guys let go of your fears and express your desires to your partner.

I have heard amazing stories of men who did just that and their women, after initial surprise, agreed to try it and ended up loving the feeling of fucking their husbands. I have heard stories of how it totally renewed the sexual spark in a relationship of many years. Yet I have also heard sad stories of women who called their husband gay and never fucked them again. Honestly, I just want to slap those women for being so sexually fucked up and for being so cruel to their husbands. So again…we come back to the point that your relationship needs to be solid, intimate, sexual, trusting, open and communicative. If divulging a yearning for pegging might destroy your relationship, you need to decide whether you can go the rest of your life not having your sexual needs met, whether you need to leave the relationship and find someone more sexually compatible or whether you can come to an agreement that you can get your needs met elsewhere. Tough questions.

 

A Request From Ruby

For those of you who have success with your ladies, do me a HUGE favor and ask her what it was exactly that convinced her to try it? Then write me an email and tell me! I want to know what persuades an initially reluctant woman to strap one on and learn to love fucking her man. And then I will do my very best to bring many more women around to the idea….because I know how much you all want it.

 

Gentlemen…I will keep your wanting and willing asses in my thoughts (that’s easy) and hope you all find yourselves enjoying a thorough pegging very soon.

 

Ruby Ryder

 

 

 

 


In the pegging world there are many men looking to explore pegging on a casual basis and not many women who are ready to sink it deep inside them outside the structure of a relationship. When I get letters from these men or find threads asking if there are any women who want to peg them I usually suggest the men either go to a professional or look for a relationship with a woman who is sexually open-minded and attempt to convince her to try it. The relationship route requires patience, dedication, timing and has no guarantee of success, sadly. And perhaps the man is not desirous of a relationship in his life; he just wants to try pegging.

When I suggest the option of a pro, I often see some variation of this response:

Never paid for sex in my life and not going to start. I don’t recommend anyone pay for something you can get for free.

Judgment about sex workers frustrates me. They rock.

But let’s explore this. Can a man find a partner who will peg him for free? Sure. Is it a difficult thing to do unless he is incredibly hot, single and awesome? Well, judging from all the posts on just about every pegging group that allows personals around the internet, I would say the answer to that is an unequivocal yes. Perhaps less difficult if you are from the younger generation (20’s) who seem to be more open-minded around pegging and sexuality in general. But still far from an easy task to accomplish. There are men on forum boards I frequent who have literally been looking for years without success.

Are there actually women out there who love to peg men and would enjoy a wild night of pegging with a relative stranger with no monies exchanging hands? Yes, there are a few here and there. They are exceedingly rare and are usually seeking out the incredibly hot, single and awesome men.

 

For a single man who has never tried pegging, let’s examine the comparison between going to a professional and trying to find a woman to peg him for free.

For Free

You can attempt to find a woman who is into pegging. You can approach a woman you have just met about pegging and possibly have her reject you as a result. You can worry about whether she will go and tell everyone in your social circles that you want to be fucked up the ass after she rejects you. (This may not be a concern for all of you, but if it is, it is a very real concern.)

You can feel uneasy about buying expensive equipment when you aren’t sure if you will even like pegging. You can wonder whether that equipment will fit her correctly and whether she will be able to have an orgasm, if she even wants to. You can worry about whether the steep learning curve will frustrate her and she will refuse to try it again after the first experience. You can hope that she will not hurt you, in her inexperience. And you can hope that the communication between you will be adequate to facilitate a good experience, because good communication is essential for pegging. And good communication takes time to develop.

Don’t mistake me here…experiencing the adventure of strap-on sex with a partner who you are already in a relationship with can be an amazingly life-changing experience. All of those equipment questions, the communication, the learning curve, the making sure you don’t get frustrated or hurt and both of you find pleasure are all still paths you will travel, but you have the foundation of a trusting, loving, communicative relationship to contain it all and help you find your way through any mis-adventures to the ecstasy. You do not have that foundation with a woman you just find and ask to peg you. You can certainly put your efforts towards finding a woman, starting a relationship with her and then asking her. But this option is only good for those men looking for a relationship.

I am not saying that experiencing pegging with a relative stranger never works; it can. But for all the reasons I have outlined, the odds are completely against you, unless you are incredibly hot, single and awesome.

The Professional

Consider the contrast of the professional experience. You contact her. She communicates with you (part of her job) to discover exactly what kind of experience you are looking for. Are you looking to combine a couple of other kinks with the pegging to enhance the experience? Are you completely new to anal play? She asks many questions to discern exactly what you need. She will give you instructions on how to prepare for your visit to her. When you go to see a professional, it is in her best interest to provide you with an optimum experience to the best of her ability so that you will be a satisfied customer and hopefully return or recommend her to others.

You do not have to worry about her inexperience or being rejected by her because of your desire for pegging. You do not need to be concerned about her pleasure or selecting (and paying for) the right equipment. You get to experience pegging for the first time…with someone who knows exactly what they are doing and wants you to have the best experience possible. She will keep your secrets, too!

Additionally, a professional is certainly likely to be more safe, clean and knowledgeable than the woman you met at a party who says sure, I’ll peg you! It’s her job. What professionals offer is the ability to tailor the experience to your desires and fantasies as well as the knowledge to make it happen safely and satisfyingly. You are paying them. It is an equitable exchange; a win-win as it were. Doesn’t that take the stress out of the equation and just let you relax and enjoy? Think about it.

With a professional, you can live out that pegging fantasy just the way you want. And if you discover that you like pegging, then you can bide your time and find a woman when the time is right and try to convince her to try it. Or, you can just continue to get your pegging with professionals and never seek out a relationship if that’s what you want.

I encourage all you “I need a woman to peg me!” guys to consider a professional. It is a valid option for men who want to explore the world of pegging apart from all the complicating factors of a relationship.

(And if you are married or partnered and you go to a professional sex worker – just don’t tell me about it! I tend to have an overemphasis on integrity and honesty and then the self-righteousness comes out…it’s not pretty.)

 

Lastly, to all you lovely sex workers out there:

Thank You.

…for everything you do, for all you know and for all you give.

You rock.

Gentlemen…

Just so you know…there is no cache of women who are eagerly waiting to take the cherry of any offered up virgin ass that is craving a pegging. It simply does not work that way.

If you just want to experience pegging, go find a sex worker to help you. And I am serious about that. Sex workers would love to have a nice clean and respectful man who wants to experience pegging pay them for services. Depending on where you live in the world, it may even be legal.

If, instead, you are looking for a relationship with a woman who will peg you, then look for a woman in the way you would normally go about finding a partner.

If you want to be sure she’s into pegging before you date her, FetLife.com is free and will connect you with kinky folk in your area. The search capabilities are definitely limited, but I believe that helps to keep out the riffraff. You can find people in your area, but you have to take the time to look at each profile to see their kinks. (There are other dating websites that cost that will sort by kink – but I can’t recommend them.)

So let’s say you find a woman you are interested in, you’ve read her profile and determined she is available. The worst possible way you can approach her is to say – “wow, you are into pegging, will you do me?” Do you do that in all your relationships? “Wow – you are cute, can I fuck you?” No – you get to know her first!

Have some respect and manners in your approach. Send her a polite letter of introduction and engage her in conversation about something other than pegging. Meet with her over coffee, take her out to dinner. Get to know the woman, don’t just pursue the strap-on.

I feel for you, guys…and I’m honestly happy you are interested in pegging, but start thinking with your big head!

And don’t forget – it is indeed possible to turn an open-minded woman who has never done pegging into an enthusiastic pegger. I have heard many first hand accounts that bear this out! For some advice on how to do that, read this:

Approaching Her About Pegging

For one man’s story on how he turned a vanilla girlfriend into a pegger, read:

Vanilla to Pegger – One Man’s Story

Best of luck with your search, gentlemen.

Ruby Ryder

What does an orgasm feels like with combined prostate stimulation or pegging and cock stimulation?

Is an orgasm like that really 10x more powerful than a “normal” orgasm?

♥ It’s 100% more intense than a normal orgasm due to the fact that a normal pegging means a fair amount of prostate stimulation before hand, and so long as she doesn’t stop while he’s cumming it can feel like the world has gone dark and time has slowed.

♥ Like my penis no longer matters.

Joking aside 99% of any orgasm I’ve ever had with prostate stimulation is better than any orgasm with out. The difference in feeling at least for me is that a cock orgasm is centered around the gathering pressure in the cock that feels like it tightens until you finally get release. That release is brief and short lived but amazing none the less. A prostate orgasm ignored the build up of tension and is more a build up of waves that start at the point of pressure and slowly ripple out over the rest of my body. Each subsequent wave slowly building, rolling through my body, and crashing against the seams of reality bringing me to an ever higher and longer lasting state of release from tension I didn’t even know I had. Either way orgasms are great and we should all try and have them as often as we can. If having something in your butt may make that orgasm better why not at least try it?

♥ Prostate stimulation enhances orgasm by different degrees for different guys.

For me, I’ll admit that at first it feels rather odd (probably because it doesn’t happen very often) and it can be uncomfortable if there’s too much stimulation to either location. It turns me into a moaner (I very rarely make involuntary noise), and makes my orgasm incredibly intense, it also increases the amount of my ejaculate.

♥ I like a vibrator against my prostate while I masturbate. My body just goes limp when I cum. Complete loss of all control and a blinding orgasm.
It’s even better if you can get a partner to do it for you, though. If you can get a blowjob while they work the vibrator, it’ll change your life 🙂 Or a handjob while getting strap-on fucked is pretty awesome too. I came on my own neck while flat on my back once from that.

♥ Pegging and cock stimulation give a fantastic orgasm. If you can cum at the right moment, double orgasm, it is indescribable. Its full body and brain. When it happens to me I am out of this world for some time. I am very experienced with anal orgasms. To cum at the right moment (double orgasm) takes a lot of exercise and skill from the person pegging.

♥10x…I guess I’ve never attempted to quantify the power of my orgasms. I can tell you the following characteristics.

  1. I, also, shoot my load much further and harder from orgasms that correlate with anal penetrations. I can feel my come moving along the entire length of my shaft. I often edge quite a bit before I come during anal penetration because my body and mind go numb with pleasure after these intense orgasms.
  2. I stay harder longer after getting off with anal penetration than I do without. I also get harder more quickly afterwards. Starting with anal penetrating orgasms (APOs) has led to the longest, wildest, and most satisfying sexual romps of my life.
  3. While normally not a talker, I cuss, moan, pant and go crazy with a strap-on stretching me. My heart races just thinking about the energy it feels me with.
  4. Pegging and self play is all I’ve ever engaged in. I’m always a switch but I prefer the more submissive orgasm to the dominant one because of the intense out of nature experience I have. I’m a corporate leader type, captain of sports team type, by day and most nights, but the right woman can find a deep wild lust that’s animalistic.

So, I reckon that means its a 12x better orgasm. Hell, maybe even a bakers dozen.

♥ Pegging gives the most fantastic Orgasm. If done right in combination with stimulating the cock, it will blow your brains out. If hands free it will last and last, you will keep cumming. My friend gives me the most fantastic prostate massage, no cock stimulation, which can last for hours and you keep cumming and cumming. Better than pegging.

♥ It’s both a mental and physical orgasm. Like, I can feel it throughout the body whereas a regular, strictly handjob, orgasm has like a two-eight second feel. It’s one of those weird times where the body takes over and the brain takes a hike 🙂

♥I’ve never been pegged, despite my very intense desire to be, however when I purchased one of those Rude Boy prostate/perenium massagers, I got a taste.

For me, it’s the first time I’ve ever been breathless during and because of an orgasm. The pressure and the alien sensations at first were mindblowing enough, but when I got used to it, I find myself wanting to just grind there constantly. I’ve not quite had a handsfree orgasm from it yet, but I’ve had a good 10-15 minutes of constant dribbling until I get so pent up I need to bring myself to a full climax. What I’m saying here, is that I can’t wait for the real thing.

♥ I can’t say for full blown pegging since my girl and I haven’t tried it, but I was trying to describe the orgasm I got from her fingering my ass while she blew me to a friend, and the only thing I could think of was: It’s like the ghostbusters threw one of their traps near me, and my cum was the ghost getting sucked inside. It was mind-blowing.

♥ My response to this might be strange because I discovered at a very young age (13 I think?) that I could have prostate orgasms… and I used to have sessions where I had those because they are so amazing and different from the norm. But, as I have gotten older, I usually end the session with a combination of prostate and edging into a… I guess the analogy would be a blended orgasm?

Ten times more powerful would be accurate, but not in all cases. I would say the average prostate+cock orgasm is 10 times more powerful than the average masturbation session. But I have had some incredible regular orgasms with women before, that rival my prostate orgasms. It just comes down to how different they feel.

As others have said, any orgasm involving the prostate feels so deep inside. A regular orgasm does have an internal component, but it gets so overshadowed because of the strong contractions and pure pressure in the base and length of the cock. A regular orgasm feels so right, like I’m totally in control and working toward this pleasurable goal and release. With prostate stimulation the orgasm always comes outta nowhere; I’m working toward it but each one seems different in some way, and I always worry that this time, I won’t get there. And when it does come, I feel totally out of control, like my body is almost doing something wrong. The tension/release and waves of pleasure are almost unbearable.

Of course, my description might differ from those simply getting prostate stimulation while they come… those are usually pretty intense but nothing like the ‘blended’ orgasm. I have never been pegged either 😛 Prostate play has always been my personal thing I do. Luckily I have a partner that wants to get into it, so we’ll be doing that soon. Can’t wait!

♥ Most of the time my man doesn’t squirt that far when he does come but lately, since we have started pegging, he is now shooting it hard and far. One cum shot flew past my face while he was riding me and landed a few feet back. He was also thrusting uncontrollably to the point I was a bit concerned. ( I have NEVER seen him like this in the 5 years that we have been together. ) He has become a moaner, which he never does.

Intimacy is often a necessary ingredient in pegging, and cannot be created with the buckle of a strap-on harness.

The fantasy of meeting someone, going home with them and pulling out the strap-on makes for great erotica fodder, yet it rarely happens in real life. For most people, a certain level of intimacy is necessary to consider indulging in pegging. Intimacy is created through trust, affection, understanding and sharing of confidences, among other things. Why does pegging often involve intimacy? Let’s take a look.

 

Trust, Trust and Trust

Anal sex requires trust. Just as most women would not consider receiving anal sex during a casual one night stand, men can feel even more strongly about needing to establish trust before allowing a woman to peg them. Basically there is a lot of room for error. The anus is a delicate area of the body and needs to be treated with care and respect. Just as it is possible for a man to give bad anal sex to a woman because he is not knowledgeable about the act and has never received anal sex himself, the same can be true for a woman pegging a man. She needs to know what she is doing and he needs to know that she knows what she is doing.

Education is extremely important. Learning about the best ways to make it enjoyable and even more importantly the mistakes to avoid can literally mean the difference between pleasure and pain. Before you try pegging, whether you are the pegger or the peggee, doing your research first will help you enjoy a better first experience.

 

Vulnerability

Men are not used to receiving and being penetrated. There is a vulnerability and openness inherent in penetration that is completely new to men. Women are quite familiar with the feeling of being penetrated during sex. For men it’s a whole new deal. And that level of vulnerability can be pretty scary, surprising, and amazing all at once. Often that vulnerability is part of the turn-on for men, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it is easy for a man to go to that space or that it is comfortable for him to be seen there. Being able to trust that the woman understands this role reversal and will not suddenly judge him when he softens and receives helps him to more fully relax and allow that vulnerability to happen.

 

I Don’t Know What I’m Doing

Women are not used to taking the reins and running the fuck. They have never had a cock, they don’t know how to use it and often have fears that they look as awkward as they initially feel. To be sure, wearing a strap-on and using it takes some getting used to. That initial period of awkwardness can be alleviated by being with an understanding partner whom you have a comfortable and close connection with. She needs to trust that he loves everything about her fucking him with a strap-on and that any learning curve will be accepted gracefully.

 

Emotional Responses

Just as the female G-Spot can trigger emotional responses in women, prostate stimulation can trigger emotional responses in men. Tears are possible. Yes, tears! Not many men will talk about it, but it does happen. Both G-Spot and prostate stimulation can touch a very deep, emotional part of some people. Those responses are not uncommon and are most often described as “good tears” or “letting emotions out that needed to come out”. (First time a man stimulated my G-Spot I was in tears.) It’s all good, but it may be surprising to experience and/or witness. Trusting his partner to be understanding and accepting of emotions or tears that might surface is so important for a man to fully open to the experience of pegging. This one is huge. Those deep emotional reactions can feel quite out of place during a casual hookup.

 

Her Reaction…to His

Men can have valid concerns about how their partner will react to their experience of being pegged. Aside from the potential emotional response, prostate stimulation can be so all-consuming for some men that it puts them in a bit of an altered state and the resulting orgasm can be full-bodied and very intense to experience and witness. The sight of a man deeply opened up, exposed, vulnerable and completely sensorially overwhelmed…is a rare and beautiful sight to behold. But more than one woman has gotten a little freaked out by seeing her man like that. Again, trusting his partner to accept what happens and not freak out is very important.

 

Peg and Tell

Social taboos seem to inflict more severe repercussions on men who enjoy pegging than on women who do. Many men will not want anyone other than their partner to know about their enjoyment of strap-on sex. Trusting their partner to keep that confidence is essential. That trust has not been established with a casual hookup. (The younger generation seems to be less concerned with this, which is quite encouraging. Slowly but surely, attitudes about pegging are relaxing.)

 

I Need a Woman to Peg Me!

I suspect all of this contributes to the difficulty men experience in finding partners to peg them.  There are few enough women who are interested in pegging to begin with. With the likelihood that a man will need trust and intimacy to feel comfortable exploring pegging, that takes it out of the realm of casual sexual exploration. So while thoughts of pegging may dominate a man’s fantasies, the reality often requires…a connection more akin to a relationship.

A man can pay a professional and trust her to be knowledgeable, keep confidences and not judge whatever reaction he has. I have recommended this to men who are intensely craving a pegging experience and I believe it is a valid option. Sex workers appreciate a clean, respectful client with specific needs. For men who crave it so much they tend to approach the strap-on before the woman, this can help to take the edge off.

 

Because of all these factors, it is more often an established couple who will engage in pegging instead of a casual hookup. The intimacy of pegging can be very powerful for all the reasons mentioned. It is good for both genders to be aware of these factors when considering pegging play, lest they be caught unawares at different turns.

This information certainly does not apply to everyone. There are people who can practice pegging with a casual hookup, and may even prefer to. Perhaps there are some parallels here to regular PIV (penis in vagina) sex, which can be engaged in either in a more casual, for fun type of manner, or can be deeply emotional and intimate – depending on the connection of the couple involved. But because pegging takes normal penetrative sexual experiences and reverses them, many unexpected things can happen, taking either gender by surprise.

 

 

 

 

Thanks to my friend D for allowing me to post this piece. There are so many men out there who want it, need it and crave it. Here is one man’s suggestion on how to find a woman to peg you.

This is for all those guys who are begging for some random lady to bend you over. Here is how I did it.

I met a regular young vanilla girl on a very vanilla dating site. We went out on a date or two before we had sex. We talked about sex more and I made some comment about how young girls are prudes. She asked how? I said that they are not adventurous. So we talked about anal sex and eventually on date 4 or 5 we have anal sex and she loves it.

A few dates later I took her to a sex shop that just happened to be in the same parking lot as the restaurant we are ate dinner at (nod nod, wink wink). After dinner and a few drinks we walked around looking at all the lingerie, toys and videos. In the toy section I casually pointed out a strap-on and asked her if she would do a girl with it. She said no way, she is not into women. Later we have more regular sex.

Then we texted a lot about all sorts of sexual topics including blow jobs and prostate massage. She said she was unsure about fingers in the ass as her nails might scratch. At some point she put two and two together and asked what I thought of strap-ons. I played dumb and said I’d like to try it with her.

I sent her to www.take-it-like-a-man.com and she did some reading. We sent more texts about it to each other. I sent her to www.peggingparadise.com/blog and she read more. Along the way she had some reservations… like – is this the only sex I want? How often do I want to do this? Etc…. She said she wanted to try it but only because we were now in a relationship. We had been dating for a few months.

She was concerned that she may not like it and didn’t want to invest in the equipment. Lucky for her I already had my own equipment. She was ok with that…and the obvious fact that I had done it before. I assured her that everything was sterilized and clean. Our first time is using a regular strap-on dildo and she is very awkward at it. I get off and keep reassuring her how great it was. She wasn’t that into it the first time.

Then I let her borrow my Realdoe. It’s a double ended dildo and she likes the flesh color. She just happens to like watching porn so I sent her to www.xhamster.com and told her to search for strap-on scenes. She got to masturbate with the Realdoe for a few days before we saw each other again. It was important that she felt comfortable with the dildo and knew how to get pleasure from it.

The second time we were together for pegging,  she was much better at fucking me because she had warmed up to the idea and knew how much I liked it. Of course I was still pleasing her first sexually before she pegged me.

So that’s it, guys. You are not going to just find some random chick off the internet and say hey baby bend me over. Find a real woman to date or get your significant other to do it.

I have done this in my past 2 relationships and it blows the girls away to do something different and unique. It’s all in the delivery and it takes time and effort but it is so worth it.

Happy Pegging!

Sort of like the cart before the horse…

For the Gentlemen…

Since diving dildo-first into exploring the world of pegging…one thing has really jumped out at me.

It is this…There are many, many of you men out there who are interested in being pegged, whether you are new to the experience or you have your own equipment in your dresser drawer. You dream of feeling that dildo slide into you, teasing you, filling you up, thrilling you. You want to be used, fucked, lovingly pegged or hammered. You crave it. You want it. You need it. You beg for it! And you frequent any websites where there might be women who are interested in it. Wow.

I guess what I am saying is I get that you guys who love pegging really love it. I mean really.

Now…I have witnessed how profoundly my guy is affected by pegging. He swoons with pleasure and gets pretty damn loud with passion. In fact he recently described his ass as “wanting and willing”  (that man so knows how to sweet talk me). So, guys, I can understand  your desire to regularly experience that intense degree of sexual bliss.  Once you’ve had it…you want more. Like your first blow job. You might even obsess about it. I get it. The strength of your desire for pegging is intense. Not to mention that men are pretty single-minded about sex in general.

Which brings me to…the methodology behind your approach of potential pegging partners.

First, I offer you an example of the worst approach I have ever personally experienced via email.

“your cock would look good in my hole”

I swear to God, just like that. No capitalization, no punctuation, nada. This approach is definitely not recommended if you are interested in finding a woman to peg you anytime in the next century.

From the woman’s point of view, here’s a hint, guys.  Don’t pursue the toy with greater enthusiasm than you pursue the woman. We women who peg, yes, it’s nice to know how much you guys enjoy it…but it is also nice to feel like you are interested in us as people first and wearers of dildos second. Get to know us…meet us for coffee or dinner…have some conversations with us. To be pursued as primarily the wearer of a strap-on is quite off-putting; like being used to satisfy your fantasy. (If you truly only want to get pegged and are not interested in the woman doing the pegging, just go find a professional.)

Please remember…There is a woman at the end of that strap-on!

An alternative method of finding a woman who pegs is to find a woman…..and turn her into a pegger. Here is a story from a friend of mine who did just that: “Vanilla to Pegger – One Man’s Story.”

 

Happy Pegging,

Ruby Ryder