Rockin' it!

So one question that comes back over and over is this:

Can a man use a double dildo to double penetrate a woman? With his penis in her vagina and the bulb end of the double in his ass, penetrating her ass? I’ll give you a moment to picture that in your head…

What a lovely porn scene that is, I must say!

This has been discussed many times in the reddit/pegging forum. I do believe I’ve heard one or two people say they tried it, it was very, very difficult but they were able to make it (kind of) work. Sort of.

So….I’m going to put this to rest and tell you that it’s probably about as difficult as a woman using a double without a harness. A very few can manage it, but it’s quite difficult.

Here’s the Double/DP challenge…

Try it out and write me the story about how it went!! I’ll read it on my podcast.


Fuze Tango

Originally published in the Tantus Sex Ed Blog, June 12, 2015

Strapless Strap-ons…

They are seductive, the way they peek out from a woman’s vaginal lips and curve sexy and bold into the air, ready for action. So many pictures of exactly that. Mesmerizing pictures. Her hand holds her ‘cock’, as if it were real. It looks amazing. Fun colors pushing apart those lips, sometimes surrounded by hair, sometimes not. I particularly like the purple ones, especially when the woman is pale-skinned. The contrast is stark and shocking, yet intoxicating. I just can’t look away. The pictures are even more exciting because I know that the other part is inside her.

Oh, and the ones that look realistic? Damn, they look like the real thing sticking right out from her nether regions! Right where a cock might be if she actually had one. It’s safe to say that these pictures have caused many erections and a lot of wet panties. I mean, you can just envision her thrusting away with it, making her partner moan with each stroke, right? I can. That’s what makes my panties wet.

Only one problem. The vast majority of women cannot hold a strapless strap-on in and effectively fuck their partner with it.

Yep. You heard me right. I can only speak with authority regarding pegging, because that’s my passion. Pegging is the world I am immersed in. That’s what happens in my bed, sometimes over the back of the couch or perhaps on the kitchen table. But I do have anecdotal feedback from my lesbian/queer/bisexual friends, and we all agree. Strapless strap-ons simply…aren’t. They don’t work well enough by themselves. They need a harness!

So let’s talk about why this is so. Again, keep in mind I can only speak with authority from the pegging perspective.


It’s Wet in There

First, when a woman gets sexually aroused, she usually gets wet. Slippery wet. Awesome wet. Well, awesome unless you are trying to hold in a strapless strap-on. It’s hard to get a grip on something when you are wet and slippery. The vagina is self-lubricating specifically to make sure that things do slide around inside. So to start with, expecting anything to stay put seems like a fool’s errand. Just sayin’.

Now, where pegging is involved, instead of holding the toy in with vaginal muscles and penetrating another vagina, it’s a vagina holding in the toy and penetrating an anal sphincter. Whereas the level of success is (anecdotally) slightly higher vagina to vagina, when it’s vagina to ass, the ass will win almost every time. Anal sphincter muscles are strong.


Get Going With Those Kegels

So let’s talk about the woman’s pelvic floor muscles that are supposed to keep the toy in, also called PC muscles. These are the ones you can exercise doing some variation of Kegel exercises, with or without a Lelo Smart Bead to help. Kegel exercises can definitely help strengthen a woman’s PC muscles. There are many benefits to exercising those muscles. Where strapless strap-ons are concerned, theoretically, the stronger a woman’s PC muscles are, the more likely that she will be able to hold a strapless toy inside her while she fucks her partner. Sounds good. Just get going with the Lelo Smart Bead and you’re good to go, right?

Wrong. Even with very strong PC muscles, the vast majority of women still cannot hold a strapless strap-on inside while doing any kind of active fucking. Sure, she can lie on her back, put her thighs tightly together and her partner can ride her. That can work.  Or she can clamp her legs tightly together and try the limited number of positions that clamped-together legs will allow. There are markedly few women for whom the ‘strapless’ concept actually works in a knees-spread, I’m going to fuck you hard and fast until you come kind of way, though.

I bring up the PC muscle component of strapless strap-ons, because it gives rise to this harmful myth: If she just does enough Kegels, she will be able to hold in a strapless strap-on.

Why is that harmful? Because even with extremely strong PC muscles, this is simply not true for most women. Sadly, women can end up feeling deficient or defective because they cannot live up to the advertising claims in this regard. Oh, me and my sucky, weak-ass PC muscles, clearly I am a slacker and have not done enough Kegels! Women have even been accused of not doing enough Kegels by their disappointed partners, who believed strapless strap-ons were actually strapless! Weird, right?

One man posted in reddit/pegging that his wife has strong enough PC muscles that when his cock is inside her, if she flexes them full strength, she can almost hurt him. Not even this ‘Queen of the Kegels’ can hold in a strapless strap-on. There’s some perspective for you.


The Cheaper Choice

So what about the cost factor? Some people buy a strapless strap-on to save money, too. Equipment for strap-on sex can get pricey, so if you can get just the one toy and skip the harness, well that will save you money, right? Brilliant! It’s a great concept, if it actually worked. Quite tempting. But quite inaccurate.


Mystifying Marketing

So why are these toys continually marketed as ‘strapless’? Especially when it’s a myth for all but about 5% of women? I don’t know, but it drives me crazy! Manufacturers continue to advertise them as strapless, making an occasional and rare note that maybe she might need a harness to hold it in. Possibly. If her muscles aren’t strong enough.

The purchasers of these toys arrive regularly to my website or to the pegging group on reddit, asking what they did wrong. Why isn’t it working? Why is it so difficult to keep it in? Because my personal mission is to change the world one ass at a time through pegging, I take the time to educate them about the real capabilities of strapless strap-ons. Most of the time they go off and get a harness and eventually find success in pegging.

With that much frustration, though, rest assured much of the pleasure factor goes right out the window, and some women who were reluctant to begin with about trying pegging with their guys reject the whole activity out of hand. Trying to use a double-ended dildo without a harness for your very first pegging experience is not something I would wish on any newbie.

By the way, now that I have established that they are not strapless, I hereby dub them ‘Doubles’, and will refer to them as such for the remainder of this article!

Not For Beginners

Here’s the next important piece of information. In my opinion, Doubles are advanced strap-on toys. The first thing a woman wearing a strap-on needs to do is to learn the basic mechanics of using a cock and fucking someone. She needs to learn how to move, develop new muscles, gain endurance and balance, because fucking someone is an athletic event. I recommend getting a flare-based single dildo with a good harness so she can practice these things. When she has rhythm, strength and confidence, when she knows just what angle, speed and depth really send her man, then get a Double. The time for a Double is down the road a ways, when she has mastered the single and you are both like a well-oiled (and lubed) machine with your pegging skills.

Many men select a Double for their first strap-on equipment purchase because they “want her to get something out of it, too”. Men are programmed to give women pleasure so it can be hard for them to just lie back and receive during the pegging process without feeling a bit guilty and uncomfortable. They need to know that she is getting off, too. Seriously, this is so sweet of them, but somewhat misguided because of the information I just mentioned above. She needs to learn how to fuck first, and the learning curve can be steep.

Picture this. Because seriously, it happens this way more often than not. The woman tries very hard to keep the Double inside her and simply can’t, much less have an orgasm like he wants her to. She doesn’t yet know how to thrust, tilt her hips, and use a cock…because she’s never had one before. All of these factors combine to make for a less than stellar first experience. In fact the recipe fails so often that I don’t understand why Doubles are still marketed as ‘strapless’. I feel that ‘strapless’ marketing is doing a great disservice to newbies interested in strap-on sex.

Doubles – Delicious, Dynamic and Deft!

Now. Here’s the important thing. There are enough things to recommend Doubles without needing to lure people in with a claim of them being strapless. It’s not like there is nothing good about Doubles other than the strapless claim. Doubles are awesome!

They give you incredible tactile feedback because of the inserted bulb that presses against your G-spot. Though you’ll never feel that silicone cock going in and out of your partner exactly like a real cock, with a Double you can feel much more subtle pressures. My favorite is that totally hot moment of initial penetration when I’m waiting for his ass to open up and welcome me in. With a Double I can feel that happening so clearly, the very moment his ass opens and he moans as I slide inside him. It’s a thrill every time and I can feel it happening more vividly with a Double.

Additionally, the pleasure factor should never be downplayed. Doubles are the only strap-on toys that provide G-spot stimulation! Huzzah! That amazing G-spot focus, together with the clitoral vibrations from the Fuze Tango, can provide women with levels of pleasure that can slide them into orgasm territory.

What do I love about doubles? I love to lie on top of my partner for a while and concentrate on all the lovely sensations inside me. Then I begin to move in a way that pleases me. I press into his ass in whatever way thrills my G-spot and clit. He can sense the change. He knows when I am moving for me, instead of for him. That is such a turn on for both of us. I love the way a Double can be used for self-pleasuring while fucking my guy.

Whether a woman orgasms or not, she will likely have a butt load (heh heh) of fun fucking her guy. A Double will definitely allow her to feel more connected and feel more pleasure while fucking her partner. For me, it’s a thrill every time I thrust inside him, feel my G-spot sing and my clit dance between us.

Yeah baby!

So there you have it. The truth (as I see it) about strapless strap-ons.

Now. Can we stop calling them strapless…please?

They are Doubles.


And here’s my favorite!

©Ruby Ryder 2015


This is a common and perfectly acceptable question from newbies. I hear it all the time. The answer, however, is pretty darn complicated. There are many things to consider when buying equipment for the first time. I finally recorded a podcast that details all the considerations that need to be made when purchasing pegging equipment for the very first time. Click on the link below. Feel free to write me with any questions you have! You can contact me at

PeggingParadise Podcast #102 – What’s the best equipment?

Strap-less Strap-ons, Harness-less Strap-ons, Double-enders or Doubles.

I’ve seen them referred to as all of the above. There are a number of manufacturers who makes these babies and they vary quite a bit. Let’s take a look at what’s out there….


Realdoe pic


The Feeldoe is perhaps the most well known and has a smooth shiny finish. They also manufacture the Realdoe, which basically looks more realistic in color and shape and has a matte finish. The Feeldoe is offered in varying sizes; Classic, Slim, Stout and More. The Realdoe is offered only in Classic and Slim (same measurements). Both models are offered with vibes and without. The vibes are not strong but some women enjoy them. The material used is 100% silicone. These dildos are quite firm – too firm for some users who prefer a softer, more gentle anal experience. The firmness of the toy does make penetration easier, however and can also make it easier to stimulate the prostate effectively. Some say the angle is not quite right for pegging. (Some say the angle is better for lesbian strap-on sex.) Other users have no such complaints and love their Feeldoe! The Realdoe is about the size of the Feeldoe Classic, and Realdoe Slim is about the size of the Feeldoe Slim. Made of a softer silicone than the Feeldoes, with a matte finish.





Fun Factory Share XS
Fun Factory Share
Fun Factory Share
Fun Factory Share XL

Fun Factory Share

The Fun Factory Share comes in 3 sizes, the regular size as well as XS and XL. The matte finish on these toys means that when it’s time to reapply lube – don’t wait because it can be irritating on the tissues rather quickly. These toys are softer, have more give to them and are a bit heavier that the Feeldoe line. Some users complain about the floppiness. They are 100% silicone. The bulb insertion is larger which presents a problem for some women but is exactly what others prefer to keep it in more effectively as well as have more sensation on their G-spot. The XL seems to be quite a challenge size-wise for most receivers!

XS – Lengths of inserted parts: active part: 3.9″ passive part: 5.5″

Diameter – peak active part: 1.37″ toy-peak passive part: 0.89″

Share – Lengths of inserted parts: active part: 3.4″ passive part: 6.3 inch”

Diameter – Toy tip active part: 1.5″ Toy tip passive part: 1.38 ”

XL – Lengths of inserted parts: active part: 3.4″ passive part: 7.1″

Diameter – Toy-peak active part: 1.49″ toy-peak passive part: 1.37″





Nexus Senior

Nexus Junior

Vixen Nexus

Another softer and more flexible double-ender, the main difference between this toy vs the Share and Feeldoe is that it was never intended to stay in without a harness. It was always intended to be used with one. The Nexus is offered in 2 sizes; Senior and Junior. A vibe option is not offered. Criticisms are that it is too floppy, but some say this can be a good thing for positions that are not a “straight shot”, so to speak. This is another toy made of 100% silicone. The base of this toy where the dildos are joined can provide nice cushioning for those hard thrusting couples.

Senior: Curved side: 5-¼” x 1-¼” Straight side: 6″ x 1-¾”

Junior: Curved side: 5″ x 1-¼” Straight side: 5-¼” x 1-¼”





Happy Valley Tango

Happy Valley Tango

Tango – 6 3/4″ x 1 3/8″ and 4 1/2″ x 1 5/8″.

Love the name. I had not heard much about the Tango, but find that it’s sold in a couple of big name on-line retailers. Described as firmer than the Nexus but softer than the Feeldoe, some people say that the Tango takes all the best parts of the other models and puts it into one toy. This toy is 100% silicone and comes with a vibe. Can’t wait to hear more..

Update: It was time for Ruby to get a double-ended dildo and she chose the Tango. Partly for the reason that it is touted as taking the best parts of all the others. I used it with the Spare Parts Joque harness. My partner enjoyed the feel of the Tango and it was not either too firm or too floppy. The size was good for him, even though he tends to be somewhat tight.

The bulb end fit nicely inside me, not too tight or too loose. Felt great. The vibe placement was excellent. Between the G-spot stimulation from the bulb and the vibe I had a lovely time. I did remove the weak bullet vibe and replace it with a WeVibe Salsa (below). Pricey choice but an excellent one. Love that little vibe; it packs a punch! Plus it is easier to get out of the dildo because it’s a little longer. The Salsa is totally rechargeable, too. Forget about the batteries.


WeVibe Tango

WeVibe Tango/Salsa

A Word About Bullet Vibes

The bullet vibes included with these toys are not very powerful. I recommend the rechargeable WeVibe Tango/Salsa bullet vibe (3″ x .625″)as much more powerful replacement. The Tango/Salsa is a tad larger than the standard bullet (2.25″ x .5″) and will stick out a bit, but that does not get in the way, and is actually easier to pull out of the dildo when you are done. The Tango and Salsa are the top of the line bullet vibes – strongest, rechargeable (no batteries!), 8 different vibe patterns and it’s waterproof! The difference between the two is that the Salsa has a typical rounded tip and the Tango has a lipstick contour tip.


Not Strapless!

You have probably heard me rant about this a fair amount – but I can’t write an article about double-enders without mentioning the “strapless” part. For heterosexual couples who are using double-ended dildos for pegging, which I assume most of you reading this here at Pegging Paradise are, it is very rare to not need a harness. (This apparently is not the case with lesbian strap-on sex.) So if pegging is what you are doing, just ignore all the ‘strap-less’ or ‘harness-free’ claims…and feel free to admire those fetching pictures of women wearing a double-ended dildo and nothing else, but do not take them for reality.

Why is this so? Kegel muscles, no matter how strong, cannot compete with anal sphincter muscles. In addition, when a woman gets turned on and juicy – that is one more challenge to holding the toy in. Do not fall for the “if she has strong enough Kegel muscles she can keep it in” reasoning. The vast majority of women cannot use these toys without a harness so there is no need to feel less-than or like you don’t have strong enough muscles. Needing a harness for pegging with a double-ended dildo is completely normal.


A Word About Lesser Doubles

I am not going to give serious discussion to toys like a long large jelly worm that you are supposed to stick in both people. Those toys are toxic and cannot be sterilized. Do not waste your time or money…and your health. There are a few others out there that cost less but you will likely find they are made of sub-standard materials. Do your research well if you are considering buying one. Make sure it is 100% silicone, phthalate-free and can be sterilized.

Update – there are now doubles like the jelly worms but made of silicone!!

Fun Factory Wave
Fun Factory Sonic

Update – New 100% silicone Double-ended dildos!
Vamp Silicone Duetto
BSisnice Olga
Wet For Her Four


Whichever toy you use – please write and share your story…contribute to the collection of knowledge about pegging equipment so the next group of beginners can benefit from our trial and error.

As always – happy pegging!


I’d like to put all manufacturers of double-ended dildos on notice that you are failing in your product descriptions on your websites.

Specifically – here’s where you are blowing it…

Your products are designed for a woman to insert one end of the toy inside herself and use the other end of the toy in her partner. Awesome so far. But you seem to have forgotten one important fact.

Her partner can be either male or female.

Now, who knows what the gender percentages are; I don’t believe those studies have been done yet. But to direct your advertising towards only one segment of that group is…blowing it.

How, specifically, are you blowing it?

You are making the claim on your manufacturer’s websites that your product is designed to be used without a harness without differentiating between heterosexual or lesbian use.

It could be that you don’t read the forum boards or you don’t have any heterosexual customers testing your products. Perhaps you just are too attached to the “strapless” claim. Maybe your product was really designed for lesbian strap-on sex and you just don’t care that there are hetero couples out there that might add to your sales. Or maybe you just want the initial sale and since you don’t sell harnesses you don’t really care what happens after that. I would like to believe you care more about your customers than that. After all, we are talking profits here.


You see… there are a LOT of heterosexual couples who try to use your products without a harness, fail and then seek advice.


In my estimation approximately 95% of women who are engaging in heterosexual strap-on sex – also called “pegging” – must use a harness to keep your product inside them. Why? Because anal sphincter muscles are stronger than vaginal muscles, no matter how many Kegels a woman does. Very, very few women are able to use a double-ended dildo for pegging without a harness. And yet you advertise it that way.

So couples try it, get frustrated and discover they need a harness. Sometimes these couples even give up and pegging is taken off the table completely – most often by the women – who experience most of said frustration. Sometimes these women even end up feeling “less than” because they are told that if their muscles were strong enough they could keep the toy inside them.

By the time they purchase a harness and get it right (if they indeed push past the frustration), their enthusiasm for recommending your product has lessened considerably from when they first bought it. And they may even have a touch of resentment that the advertising of your product did not mention a harness is usually essential to successful use, which alienates customers from additional purchases.

What you want is success stories with your product. Success stories boosts sales.


Happy Valley Tango says, “works perfectly with a harness”.

Not bad. But it would be better to say a harness is recommended for pegging.


Tantus’ Feeldoe/Realdoe has “patented strapless strap-on” claims all over the website. The only mention of a harness is very hard to find and says, “If you just love your leathers, or haven’t done your Kegel’s don’t fret, an old fashioned 3 strap harness will fit it! Bike shorts work wonders, too, and fittingly so since it really is like learning to ride a bike.”

Cute, but implies that most women should be able to use it without a harness. And they even say that 80% of their sales are to heterosexual couples! You’d think they would give them more accurate information since that is the bulk of their sales.


Fun Factory Share says, “without a harness”, “suitable for harnesses”, and “…slight ridge for improved hold…” depending on whether you are looking at the Share XL, the Share or the Share XS (in that order).

Confusing and inaccurate.


The less well-known doubles don’t do any better…

Eternal Swan (not in USA) says, “created to be worn without a harness”.

Ummm…for whom? Not for heterosexuals.

Fetish Fantasy Elite 8″ Strapless Strap-On says, “hands-free penetration without a harness or strap” and claims, “It’s great to use on both sexes”.

Misleading and inaccurate.


I remain puzzled by the lack of factual information for heterosexual couples exploring strap-on equipment. The couples are often new at this, so they need good information. They are also the majority of your sales – so it would behoove you to pay attention and give them what they need to make a good purchasing decision.

Thankfully, some retailers are putting more information on their websites through reviews as well as product descriptions. Hopefully the manufacturers will realize the importance of informing their customers with facts and recognizing the large share of the double dildo market that heterosexuals comprise.